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# Don't call it a book club.

Hot Takes; Dumb Nerds

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## Episode

- [Republic of Thieves: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/republic-of-thieves-part-three/) - Dan has a theory IRL (12:15 to skip). Luke and Dan have a few questions about Locke's methods. Justice for Donkle or whatever his name is. Finally, Luke and Dan debate the twist no one saw coming. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Republic of Thieves: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/republic-of-thieves-part-two/) - You've probably never heard this one before, but Luke had a weird uber drive recently (9:25 to skip). Locke loses his swag and wow, we don't have a ton of time to turn this election around, huh. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Republic of Thieves: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-republic-of-thieves-part-one/) - Dan took another trip and folks, you gotta go! Also it seems like the import laws in Puerto Rico are slightly more complex than Dan learned on his trip, but definitely read up on the Merchant Marine Act of 1920 if you want more info. (13:45 to skip). Luke mistrusts any boy without impeccable hygiene
- [A Dance With Dragons: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-dance-with-dragons-part-four/) - As a fantasy podcast you know we gotta talk about the new Odyssey movie (18:30 to skip). Jon's messing up and we're officially a pro-Cersei podcast now. Can't wait for the next book to come out! Next week we are starting The Republic of Thieves by Scott Lynch. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro
- [Warbreaker: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/warbreaker-part-one/) - Dan kicks us off by attempting to alienate our listeners with a hot take about superhero movies (8:30), feel free to tell us how you feel about his awful opinion. This episode was a wild one and covers the first 20 chapters of Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson. There are a lot of chances for audience
- [A Dance With Dragons: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-dance-with-dragons-part-three/) - Dan went to a fantasy world IRL (9:37 to skip). In this house we believe in the Old Gods and we don't trust the maesters. Winterfell has officially devolved into the worst hang of all time. We are introduced to a black sheep in the Stark family and Luke is perfectly happy taking orders from
- [A Dance with Dragons: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-dance-with-dragons-part-two/) - Luke is being unsafe at the workplace (8:40 to skip). Give us a mini army and we'll come up with the best dumb gimmick on the battlefield. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Dance with Dragons: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-dance-with-dragons-part-one/) - Dan brags about how long he can hold it (9:20 to skip). Dany you have dragons, ride around on them! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Wise Man's Fear: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-wise-mans-fear-part-four/) - No warm up as this episode is like the book: it runs long. What do all wise men fear? Weebs, teen fraud, and writing a character who is the most special boy. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Wise Man's Fear: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-wise-mans-fear-part-three/) - We're complaining about tipping again (8:30 to skip). Kvothe is also a sex god now. Sure, why not. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Wise Man's Fear: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-wise-mans-fear-part-two/) - Dan is opening up the tent flaps to all (7:35 to skip). Theories abound in this episode. Of course there is some chemistry talk and finally, Luke breaks through the ice around Dan's frigid heart. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Wise Man's Fear: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-wise-mans-fear-part-one/) - Reading location tier list (14:09 to skip). Kvothe is always doing the most and someone needs to tell him to chill. Good thing Luke and Dan are on the case. Also apologies about the air conditioner in the background, it is HOT down here! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Whispers of the Storm: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/whispers-of-the-storm-part-three/) - Quick tip: Don't listen to this sode if you're a big Redlin fan! We're taking a few weeks off for summer travel and returning mid June with The Wise Man's Fear. It's been a while so use the extra time to catch back up on Name of the Wind! Special thanks to VOLO for the
- [Whispers of the Storm: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/whispers-of-the-storm-part-two/) - Warmup today is a question from an honored audience member (8:00 to skip). Redlin continues to be really cool, and his girlfriend is totally real. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Whispers of the Storm: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/whispers-of-the-storm-part-one/) - Dan returns to the well that is Mission Impossible (9:30 to skip). What is this place? We need a detailed breakdown of the economics of this land right now. Also Z. B. getting a little cheeky in this one. Dan might be biting off a little more than he can chew and Luke on team
- [A Wizard of Earthsea](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-wizard-of-earthsea/) - Gather round for your routine water lecture (10:30 to skip). New perk for subscribers; you get to learn our real names and gain immense power over us. Next week we're starting Whispers of the Storm by Z.B. Steele Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Jurassic Park: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/jurassic-park-part-three/) - As chaos theory predicts, this episode is outta control!!! The boys speculate about the psyche of a T-Rex and also Dr. Grant. You will never guess which one is more rational. Finally, Dan needs your help to answer a Jurassic Park movie mystery. He is not letting this go. Special thanks to VOLO for the
- [Jurassic Park: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/jurassic-park-part-two/) - Dan goes to the circus (15:25 to skip). This park has a lot of really well thought out safety features and I'm glad we're keeping our labor costs down. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Jurassic Park: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/jurassic-park-part-one/) - IPA heads are lying (3:00 to skip). Dan has some serious questions about how we can know what the past was like without living through it. This book has our classic game: character or author, which one is terrible? If you haven't come to expect science talk from Luke and Dan yet, welcome to your
- [Oathbringer: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/oathbringer-part-four/) - No warmup on this one since in classic Sanderson fashion the ending of Oathbringer has a lot of ground to cover. After the big revelation, we of course discuss some human-Parshendi relations. Dan comes out swinging with some really well thought out theories, and Luke has some constructive criticism for Dalinar.Next week we are starting
- [The Goblin Emperor: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-goblin-emperor-part-three/) - Time to rant a little about our real jobs (10:30 to skip). Turns out being nice is all you need to be a good emperor! Next week we're reading Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Goblin Emperor: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-goblin-emperor-part-two/) - Movie talk is back (13:48 to skip). Luke needs everyone to do better and Dan needs Maia to think with his head for once. Also we have officially found the best answer for, "What is your biggest weakness?" Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Goblin Emperor: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-goblin-emperor-part-one/) - We come up with the next billion-dollar idea in real time (12:25 to skip). The bar is low, but elves maybe less racist than expected? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Gone World: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-gone-world-part-three/) - The boys get very warmed up: dog talk and TV talk (14:40 to skip). Dan gives the official name of the Time Cop show and Luke needs answers. Actually so does Dan. What is going on here? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Gone World: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-gone-world-part-two/) - We like to walk the fine line between delicious dive restaurant and unnecessary risk (6:40 to skip). Moss (and Scully?) are really bad at their job! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Gone World: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-gone-world-part-one/) - Dan experienced a minor annoyance this week and needed to talk about it (12:08 to skip). Get ready for the boys to talk about time travel the entire episode with the only interruption to tell a woman how to do her job. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Raven Scholar: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-raven-scholar-part-three/) - We're warming up by putting Pho in the hot seat (6:25 to skip). Ok but Andren did kinda save the world, right? Next week we're starting The Gone World by Tom Sweterlisch. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Raven Scholar: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-raven-scholar-part-two/) - Luke is sick of being nice (8:38 to skip). Dan is the theory wizard and Luke doesn't get the whole emperor thing. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Raven Scholar: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-raven-scholar-part-one/) - Dan embarrasses himself at yet another restaurant (11:30 to skip). Neema needs friends and knives that cause the apocalypse should stay in the vault. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Color of Magic: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-color-of-magic-part-two/) - Rapid fire warmups (15:58 to skip)! Dan has a lot of problems and Luke gets his money's worth out of that PhD. Also, the boys get Radioactive this ep. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Color of Magic: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-color-of-magic-part-one/) - Dan has a new, ambitious plan to reach "regular" status at his local restaurant (12:20 to skip). Big innovations in this one, tourism gets invented and we lay the foundation for grimoire sweatshops. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Long Way to a Small Angry Planet: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-long-way-to-a-small-angry-planet-2/) - It's that time of year so enjoy your Christmas movie slop (10:15 to skip). Ohan does his own research and Jenks needs to use iCloud backup more. We're taking a couple weeks off and then starting back in the new year with The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett. Special thanks to VOLO for the
- [The Long Way to a Small Angry Planet: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-long-way-to-a-small-angry-planet/) - We've got a (blessedly short) update on pheromones (2:35 to skip). Rosemary risks it all and we're never forgiving pirates and scammers. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-long-way-to-a-small-angry-planet-part-one/) - Luke gives his formal report (47:00 to skip). Alien vibe check to start and captain Ashby has never been online. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Tainted Cup: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-tainted-cup-part-two/) - Brownie taste test time! (12:30 to skip). If anyone is trying to find good gift ideas for us, can we suggest a Leviathan Bone sword? Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Next week we'll be starting The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet by Becky Chambers. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Tainted Cup: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-tainted-cup-part-one/) - Dan offers lifehacks to make up for a distinct lack of brownies. He claims next week for sure. (13:18 to skip). The maximum occupancy of these houses has got to be like 2. Luke wants the vaccine milk now. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Carl's Doomsday Scenario: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/carls-doomsday-scenario-part-two/) - Brownies have peaked (9:15 to skip). Carl's fans contain multitudes and being a crawl guide is my passion. We're starting The Tainted Cup by Robert Jackson Bennett next week! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Carl's Doomsday Scenario: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/carls-doomsday-scenario-part-one/) - "I'm not sure what to do with my hands" - Luke (11:15 to skip). Dan expects the existential crisis any day now and Luke doesn't think Donut is all that great. Also the character creation screen is giving the boys a lot of trouble. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Watchers Movie](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-watchers-movie/) - creepypasta discussion incoming (24:00 to skip). This week we are all The Watchers. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Watchers: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-watchers-part-two/) - Our halloween decorations are better than yours (14:35 to skip). We do the math on our professor's body count and then we're spreading the news. Next week we're watching The Watchers movie and reading your creepypastas! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Watchers: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-watchers-part-one/) - Luke and Dan both make people mad to get warmed up (13:28 to skip). Be sure to post your creepypasta on the Discord for Luke and Dan to rank! What are these people doing aside from making a Youtube video that gets huge numbers? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Will of the Many: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-will-of-the-many-part-four/) - We remember your dog's name (8:25 to skip). Monarchies are bad, actually. Vis breaks the record for most times falling unconscious. Spooky season starts next week with The Watchers by A.M. Shine. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Will of the Many: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/will-of-the-many-part-three/) - Luke is getting old (9:05 to skip). The boys are flummoxed by this twist and pretty annoyed with Vis, the perfect independent voter. Also, its definitely time to dip. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Will of the Many: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-will-of-the-many-part-two/) - Car Salesman: *slaps roof of human body*, "this bad boy can hold so many kidneys". Really hoping you all get that reference (10:20 to skip intro). Ship battles rock and never touch anything in a crypt ritual. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Will of the Many: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-will-of-the-many-part-one/) - Luke and Dan offload their baggage (8:50 to skip). School is back in session folks! The boys struggle with some basic math and aerodynamics. Also wild speculation about Will incoming. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Memory Called Empire: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-memory-called-empire-part-three/) - Professor Dan is back and (9:30 to skip). Imagos aren't real people and Yskandr just keeps getting hotter. The Will of the Many by James Islington next week! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Memory Called Empire: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-memory-called-empire-part-two/) - Luke reveals how AI is actually useful and Dan forgets he is on a Fantasy book podcast for 5 minutes (13:17 to skip). Luke and Dan talk culture and politics, finally. Also, detailed analysis of mail transportation in the Empire. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Memory Called Empire: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-memory-called-empire-part-one/) - Dan visits a city you've probably never heard of (8:15 to skip). Imagos are neat and we love our new Teixcalaan names. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Kings of the Wyld: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/kings-of-the-wyld-part-three/) - Luke scolds a sociopath (07:45 to skip). The hat is everything and you have time to practice your harmonica while traveling. Lastly, I don't care if the druin go extinct. There, I said it. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Kings of the Wyld: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/kings-of-the-wyld-part-two/) - We're reviewing dog toys now (9:20 to skip). To be true adventurers it's important to try out all the local cuisine... with some exceptions. Seems like a good time to build up our efficient deforestation industry. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Kings of the Wyld: Part one](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/kings-of-the-wyld-part-one/) - Luke kicks us off with a rant that ends with Dan encouraging him to engage in some *light* bribery (10:00 to skip). Is anyone else surprised they have lasted this long? Also, give the wives a break please. They are putting up with a lot. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Babel: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/babel-part-three/) - This one almost turns into a book club. Almost. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Babel: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/babel-part-two/) - Super original rant today; scheduling doctor appointments sucks (5:30 to skip). Give us one of these silver bars that tells you when you've made a mistake, and we'll save the world. Apparently, linguists are bad at both math and coming up with murder plans. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Babel: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/babel-part-one/) - We're back and Dan met some lunatics on his trip (13:20 to skip). College is the best time of your life whether you go to modern day Uni or Babel in the 1800s. For those on the job search, Oxford is always hiring for their silver bar placebo testing lab. Special thanks to VOLO for
- [Mailbag Impossible](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/mailbag-impossible/) - Luke and Dan dig into the mailbag this sode and talk Murderbot. See y'all in July! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Blacktongue Thief: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-blacktongue-thief-part-three/) - Yard talk (11:28 to skip)! Luke rejects middle age lady aura and Dan needs an ELI5 for the goblin quarter. Never mess with a wizard hut. Just don't. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Blacktongue Thief: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-blacktongue-thief-part-two/) - Diet soda is in, and probiotics are out (9:30 to skip). Join us as we brainstorm the best way to deal with our very frequent Kraken interactions. You also know we gotta dive into the whole goblins can drink seawater thing. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Blacktongue Thief: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-blacktongue-thief-part-one/) - Luke earns a new nickname (10:25 to skip). This episode has a lot of school talk so get that cap and gown ready! Anyone ready for the nicest table of all time and is every hour the witching hour? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Ninth House: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-ninth-house-part-two/) - Honk honk, friends (8:35 to skip). Luke and Dan find their house and lose their friends? Then Luke absolutely reads Darlington and Dan gives a book report. Is Dawes really not going to double check? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Ninth House: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/ninth-house-part-three/) - Luke and Dan form a neighborhood watch (11:30 to skip). Darlington is voted most overrated while Alex obvi takes home the MVP trophy. How much are you paying for the goat milk treatment? Next week we're starting The Blacktongue Thief by Christopher Buehlman! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Ninth House: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/ninth-house-part-one/) - Dan pitches his new business idea (7:45 to skip). Man, these guys need to figure out some better uses for their magic abilities, right? AI libraries are overrated. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Dungeon Crawler Carl: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/dungeon-crawler-carl-part-two/) - Time for the AI talk (6:42 to skip). Dan wants to stop the AI footpocalypse and Luke doesn't want to get his hands dirty. Glurp glurp folks. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Dungeon Crawler Carl: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/dungeon-crawler-carl-part-one/) - Horse or knockout, pick a side (13:00 to skip). Dan's going all the way past the 18th floor with his nitro-blast (patent pending). We've once again found a reason why Millennials are the best. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Fourth Wing: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/fourth-wing-part-three/) - Bikers rights (11:00 to skip)! New worst power discussion incoming. Chocolate cake is not food and Dan's theory takes flight. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Fourth Wing: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/fourth-wing-part-two/) - Dan wants recognition for his restaurant loyalty (11:25 to skip). Violet is taking the chosen one trope to a whole new level and is the absolute most special. Liam is the greatest and his power is unstoppable. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Fourth Wing: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/fourth-wing-part-one/) - No warm up, things are hot enough already. Worst dragon power of all time? Also, who is growing flowers specifically for this purpose? Power to the scribes and we need education reforms now. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Wind and Truth: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/wind-and-truth-part-four/) - Controversial opinion: watching sports is a lot more fun if you cheer for the team that's going to win (8:00 to skip). Adolin is unstoppable and Kaladin deserves a big egg breakfast. Also are you worshipping a god named Tanner? Next week we're starting Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros. Special thanks to VOLO for the
- [Wind and Truth: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/wind-and-truth-part-three/) - Luke and Dan are living on hard mode sometimes (9:00 to skip). Is it time to conquer Shinovar? Does Odium follow daylight savings time? Are we peeing in the pool? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Wind and Truth: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/wind-and-truth-part-two/) - The fellas tell you how to host a proper board game night (8:40 to skip). Shin society seems quite stable despite some uh... shaky foundations. Kaladin needs to teach me some dance lessons and Adolin is way too into cards! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Wind and Truth: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/wind-and-truth-part-one/) - Luke and Dan don't want your gifts (12:13 to skip). Its been a while since the boys have thought about Roshar so there is definitely some catching up to do. Never let anyone pack your bag and never bully a national treasure. Finally, get some lawyers on this case. Special thanks to VOLO for the
- [The Dark Forest: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-dark-forest-part-three/) - Dan has another run in with a weird boi (9:35 to skip). Is everyone in the future a big dummy or did they do a big mass mental seal day off camera? Starship Earth rocks and I can't wait to hear about the reunion in a couple millenia. Next week we're starting Wind and Truth
- [Ghostwater](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/ghostwater/) - As a very professional podcast we never give away how much we like or dislike a book. Ok never is a strong word, you might be able to tell if we just liked Ghostwater or loved it. We start out addressing comments and highlights that we missed (email us dcbc@dontcallitabookclub or tweet/DM us @DCitaBC or
- [The Dark Forest: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-dark-forest-part-two/) - Movie watch (9:34 to skip)! Luke and Dan are not impressed. Get wallbroken, nerds. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Dark Forest: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-dark-forest-part-one/) - Happy new year folks, today we're warming up with all things pie (10:15 to skip). Apparently, this is a hot take, but we're coming out strongly by saying that imaginary girlfriends are in fact uncommon and a problem. Also, listen to hear our preliminary plans and tell us how great we would be at the
- [Three Body Problem: Season 1](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/three-body-problem-season-1/) - This one's for the couch potatoes. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Mother of Learning: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/mother-of-learning-part-three/) - Christmas movies and tree decorating, hear our tips for getting into the christmas spirit (10:00 to skip). The age old question about magical schools arises; are the students too lazy? Zorian joins the NRA, and the primordials seem like a little much. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Mother of Learning: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/mother-of-learning-part-two/) - This may have become the most educated podcast you are listening to. Luke is making space for Defying Gravity (7:25 to skip). Zorian doesn't realize what he is asking these teachers to do for him. Which is more important, technique or just getting reps? Also what even is money? Special thanks to VOLO for the
- [Mother of Learning: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/mother-of-learning-part-one/) - Dan is out $15 and he is not happy about it (12:50 to skip). This character definitely needs to level up, but mainly in the rizz department. How many cycles is it taking you to ask out your crush? How many cycles is it taking you to try flaming chainsaw juggling? Special thanks to VOLO
- [The Gunslinger: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-gunslinger-part-two/) - Time for some pop culture throwbacks to see where our thoughts were a few years ago (10:30 to skip). Using a falcon in your coming-of-age ritual is cheating and invisibility is a villain power. Whose joining us in the rail cart olympics? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Gunslinger: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-gunslinger-part-one/) - Its finally getting cool (for one of the boys) and it is welcome (5:20 to skip). Luke is getting notes of Mad Max and Dan is tasting a hint of Fallout 3. Also, Stephen is one horny fella. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- ['Salem's Lot: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/salems-lot-part-three/) - Dan is a Bezos fan (10:31 to skip)? Vampire rights incoming and Catholic priests are the original nerds. Also, listen to the medical experts when they say a bad case of being a vampire is going around. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- ['Salem's Lot: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/salems-lot-part-two/) - Do you think you can pull off a fedora? Send us a fit check (8:00 to skip). Critical question during vampire infestations, how many safe zones do you get? If you're sharing pasta with your cat, at least have the decency to add some meatballs. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- ['Salem's Lot: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/salems-lot-part-one/) - Bigfoot hunters beware: Dan is not buying it (13:50 to skip). Luke and Dan feel the siren song of becoming weird conservative guys but they resist. Also please stop putting spoilers on the back of the book! The nature of evil has an origin and it is the word, "jahoobies". Special thanks to VOLO for
- [Outskirter's Secret: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/outskirters-secret-part-three/) - It's movie time again! Turns out Luke and Dan are all in on movie theaters these days (9:20 to skip). Dan and Luke's outskirter tribe is doubling down on storytelling and reaping the benefits. Having a cool name is now critical, and the Steerswoman rules continue to be a little flexible. It's spooky season folks
- [Outskirter's Secret: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/outskirters-secret-part-two/) - Don't mind the number of times we refer to the star in Orion's armpit (4:53 to skip). Dan gets a theory in off rip and Luke is tired of these phonies pretending to be deep. Also quick tip: if you see a mysterious alien looking egg DO NOT TOUCH IT. Nine times out of ten
- [Outskirter's Secret: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/outskirters-secret-part-one/) - Luke's got a new mic and a new gym routine (8:10 to skip). The Outskirts are lookin rough, but maybe this big party makes it all worth it. Are you guys keeping a watch when you go on backpacking trips? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Steerswoman: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-steerswoman-part-two/) - Dan thinks its time for a car revolution (08:35 to skip). The steerswomen are certainly one of the organizations of all time. Rowan needs someone to tell her less is sometimes more. Also, don't worry about what the wizards are doing behind the curtain. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Steerswoman: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-steerswoman-part-one/) - We've figured out the foolproof way to make a hit fantasy show (12:30 to skip). Luke and Dan are both applying to become steersmen, but have some disagreements on the rules. The magicians seem kinda lame, and you absolutely cannot let a barbarian take a tour of your country. Special thanks to VOLO for the
- [The Fires of Vengeance: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-fires-of-vengeance-part-three/) - Water bottle talk (8:24 to skip)! Luke apologizes for his thought crimes and Dan has a spicy theory. The doctor has just prescribed 400ccs of vengeance and Jabari is eating it up. Also WHO ARE WE ROOTING FOR!? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Fires of Vengeance: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-fires-of-vengeance-part-two/) - Dan goes to the movies to get the essence of life (10:40 to skip). Tau gets a bad grade on RateMyProfessor, but man is he good at fighting. The Cull are kinda lame but we've got some notes on how they can be improved. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Fires of Vengeance: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-fires-of-vengeance-part-one/) - Luke desperately tries to avoid sounding like a middle schooler to someone on the phone (11:50 to skip). Who is still choosing to fight Tau? How is Tau's body still functional? How powerful is rage? How close you getting to a dragon? The Queen's faction is the bad guys, right? Special thanks to VOLO for
- [The State of the Fantasy Union](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-state-of-the-fantasy-union/) - Luke and Dan talk about other fantasy/scifi things they are into right now. Big Wonka talk and the search for satisfaction is never ending. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Son of a Liche: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/son-of-a-liche-part-three/) - Luke's intro rant proves advertising works folks (10:18 to skip). Dan names the MVPs and Luke needs to know, "where the money at?" Also the number of time bomb opportunities are endless. The limit does not exist. Give them a time bomb now! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Son of a Liche: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/son-of-a-liche-part-two/) - Luke starts this episode by claiming that USA sports are the best in the world and soccer is for a bunch of whiney babies (11:28 to skip). Luke and Dan return to well of necromantic army talk. Luke wants to do a little heist talk and Dan is happy to oblige. Special thanks to VOLO
- [Son of a Liche: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/son-of-a-lich-part-one/) - Book reports, Winnie the Pooh and joining the undead army to avoid knee pain. I'm thinking we're back. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Final Empire: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-final-empire-part-two/) - Luke kicks us off with a bike rant (11:45 to skip). Luke said it best, we are have finally gotten into the balls. Dan needs someone to connect these big dots for once. Listener, what is the best misting power and why is it iron or steel? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and
- [A Feast for Crows: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-feast-for-crows-part-four/) - Get ready for your book report! Luke and Dan are taking another short break but will be back in July. This episode starts with Furiosa talk; no skipping! Dan identifies one more area that the public school system is failing our children and Luke reminds us that everything is made up and the points don't
- [A Feast for Crows: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-feast-for-crows-part-three/) - Photos are out, but selfies are in (9:35 to skip). Cersei continues her historic cringe run, sigils are overhyped, and Arya needs her own hot sauce recipe. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Feast for Crows: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-feast-for-crows-part-one/) - Luke and Dan are back! Big updates incoming (13:12 to skip). Nobody's snatching these chains and you will never guess who is getting the pen working. Which is worse, head or foot? I don't know anything about a big 3, but I know who definitely shouldn't be in there and his name rhymes with Diewyn.
- [A Feast for Crows: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-feast-for-crows-part-two/) - Compliments only on other peoples food folks (8:15 to skip)! Sam is a legend and we're excited to hear his ballad. Cersei is queen of foolproof plans, and holy cow Sansa is soooooo alone. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Best Served Cold: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/best-served-cold-part-one/) - Honestly, this warmup rant is all over the place (11:50 to skip). Does everyone in the North need to do a big group therapy session? Cause it seems like they definitely need a talk. Speaking of guys who need therapy, Joe needs to talk to someone about his hatred for oatmeal. Also, you will not
- [Best Served Cold: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/best-served-cold-part-two/) - All the college football fans that listen to the pod, this warmup is for you (12:20 to skip). Shivers needs a confidence boost, and we've got some business advice for low level assassins. Day needs to spend some more time in the lab... you guys aren't tired of our chemistry rants, right?Special thanks to VOLO
- [Best Served Cold: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/best-served-cold-part-three/) - Dan is back on the fairgrounds, what will he find this time? (12:20 to skip) Thank god Cosca is back and he might just be a wizard. Jinxes make a big comeback and we need help coming up with some new idioms. Happy turkey day everyone!Next week we're starting Legend by David Gemmell.Special thanks to
- [Legend: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/legend-part-one/) - Introducing: gray cousins (10:50 to skip). The drama is peak and the cringe is ripe. Luke does a significant amount of backpedaling in this ep. Also is Druss too cool? He feels a little too cool.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Legend: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/legend-part-two/) - Why you don't mess with Thanksgiving dishes (16:30 to skip). This episode starts off with some pretty classic Luke and Dan joking around and then quickly turns into the Dunk on David hour.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Frugal Wizard's Handbook: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-frugal-wizards-handbook-part-one/) - Dan gets bullied by his local beekeeper (15:00 to skip). Folks, these alternate dimensions are seeing some pretty messed up stuff, right? Despite that we're willing to risk it if there's magic involved.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Frugal Wizard's Handbook: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-frugal-wizards-handbook-part-two/) - Luke joins the truck club (8:00 to skip). Science talk is back and we've got a big mass balance problem to solve. Our boy John gets into the holiday spirit and finally figures out what a friend is. We're taking a couple weeks off, but stay tuned for the next book. Happy holidays everyone!Special thanks
- [The Bone Ships: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-bone-ships-part-one/) - Get ready for a discussion about thick drinks and child ghosts. Are these pirates too harsh or not harsh enough with their punishments? Luke and Dan honestly can't tell. Also, someone needs to get these pirates PFDs ASAP!Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Bone Ships: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-bone-ships-part-two/) - We're not ready to leave Christmas behind quite yet (11:30 to skip). All we want is a new big windy bird best friend, but Lucky Meas isn't helping. And while the clothes made of fish skin are uncomfy, they sure are stylish.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Bone Ships: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-bone-ships-part-three/) - Luke and Dan wrap up The Bone Ships by talking about modern art and the means of production. Dan gloats about his called shot, and Luke gets hyped about magic birds. Join the boys in the big meeting room, its time for some macroeconomics talk on the pod. Finally, ship health bars: worth it?Special thanks
- [A Darker Shade of Magic: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-darker-shade-of-magic-part-one/) - Chefs are artists and it's immoral to tweak their creations (9:40 to skip). Kell is a big ol' dummy who is too scared to leave his hometown, but at least he doesn't cut his palm. Also, maybe we should rename the pod Accidental Pirates?Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Darker Shade of Magic: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-darker-shade-of-magic-part-two/) - Luke hits us with the hottest of snack takes. But actually he is very right (7:21 to skip). Luke is getting ready to level up and Dan wants someone to start blasting. Luke also tells on himself vis-a-vis bone magic.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Darker Shade of Magic: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-darker-shade-of-magic-part-three/) - Just a heads up before you get into this one, we had a little recording issue so Dan's audio is a little off. Dan tells us how he turned into a bead boi (13:15 to skip). Everybody knows you can't summon a serpent and not expect it to backfire, and we're excited to hear more
- [Leviathan Wakes: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/leviathan-wakes-part-one/) - You accepting cookies or naw? (09:02 to skip) Luke and Dan do flesh talk and we get taken to office hours a few times this episode. Luke needs better food and Dan gives himself homework.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Leviathan Wakes: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/leviathan-wakes-part-two/) - Turns out the teens are alright (6:25 to skip). Our crew needs to get some hobbies and stop being bored all the time. Holden is not to blame but the guy sure does have a talent for public speaking. And don't worry, Dan did come prepared with a fun space fact.Special thanks to VOLO for
- [Leviathan Wakes: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/leviathan-wakes-part-three/) - Luke and Dan complain about modern life (08:30 to skip). Fred is either a lucky idiot or a tactical genius and there is no room for error. Also, how about we bring it on back? I know a lot is going on right now, but we would all love if you could just bring it
- [Caliban's War: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/calibans-war-part-one/) - Dan learns the rules of basketball (9:35 to skip), then we give our takes on the first episode of The Expanse TV show (up to 23:15, then book talk). Now we know the key to being a powerful politician: distracting snacks. Now that we're in space it's time to establish Grenade-free zones, and can anyone
- [Caliban's War: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/calibans-war-part-two/) - Dan goes off the grid (11:00 to skip). Turns out Bobbie has fallen for the propaganda, and Avasarala is a terrible boss. Taste your soup before you add salt, folks! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Caliban's War: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/calibans-war-part-three/) - Luke and Dan go fishing for a sponsorship (7:00 to skip). If you were wondering who Caliban is, stick around to find out! Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music. And to our Patrons for supporting the pod all these years!
- [The Horror at Red Hook and The Ballad of Black Tom: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-horror-at-red-hook-and-the-ballad-of-black-tom-part-two/) - We're standing up for everyone's right to not text back (14:20 to skip). It's time for a new addition to our most hated characters list, welcome to the club Mr. Howard! Even the worst world takeover by an eldritch horror will be ok as long as you have prep time.Next week we're reading the first
- [The Horror at Red Hook and The Ballad of Black Tom: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-horror-at-red-hook-and-the-ballad-of-black-tom-part-one/) - Luke reminds us that while ball is life, sometimes life is not ball (9:06 to skip). Hitting Lovecraft with a classic compliment sandwich. A nice, tall compliment sandwich. Also what does it truly mean to grift? Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Shadow Over Innsmouth & Litany of Earth](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/shadow-over-innsmouth-litany-of-earth/) - I know we talk about food a lot, but have we already done this warmup? (9:30 to skip) Frog/Fish people are looking for mates, time to get in line. Turns out Dan is really brave and is up for a tour of Innsmouth. Plus is our narrator just kind of a jerk?To answer a question
- [To Shape a Dragon's Breath: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/to-shape-a-dragons-breath-part-three/) - Who wants to get in on some trivia? (12:00 to skip). Liberty invents the grindset and Marta needs a new brain. Also, who doesn't love to get back at the mean chemistry teacher. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [To Shape a Dragon's Breath: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/to-shape-a-dragons-breath-part-one/) - Luke gives us a solid gold business idea that I would have literally used today (8:49 to skip). First off, every book needs a pronunciation guide, thank you, Moniquill.Secondly, everyone needs a cuddle dragon. Luke takes a brave stand against imperialism and Dan wants to know the dragon school acceptance criteria.Special thanks to VOLO for
- [To Shape a Dragon's Breath: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/to-shape-a-dragons-breath-part-two/) - Dan gets a clone (9:00 to skip). Barbecues are out, Luncheons are in. Turns out Dan knows all the calls for square dancing (we learn a lot about Dan in this sode tbh). What do I have to do to get a dance card at my next party?Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and
- [The Final Empire: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-final-empire-part-three/) - Who needs a warmup when you've got a classic Brandon Sanderson finale! You miss 100% of the shots (at the Lord Ruler) you don't take so let's mix it up a little. We're handing out awards and assigning roles in this one; coach, MVP, and X-factor are already set, what did we miss? Next week
- [The Final Empire: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-final-empire-part-one/) - Dan loves Will Ferrell and wishes him well in all future endeavors (8:00 to skip). So glad our team has some spare time in their busy schedule to help overthrow an immortal emperor. Drinking heavy metals is normally bad for you, but spikes through the eyes is working for people in this story so who's
- [Light Bringer: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/lightbringer-part-three/) - Dan has a workplace dispute (11:58 to skip). Luke and Dan are screaming this episode. One is a scream of pain, the other a scream of joy. You gotta listen to find out which is which. What's the deal with jumpPads? And finally, Darrow is back baby!Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro
- [Light Bringer: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/lightbringer-part-two/) - Luke is not going climbing and that is final (9:25 to skip to book talk). Give us some squoosh rooms and we can defend any moon base. Big dad energy in this section and Quicksilver doesn't want any of it. Also Lysander suuuuuucks.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Light Bringer: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/light-bringer-part-one/) - Dan and Luke are hyped about Baldur's Gate 3 (7:10 to skip). Get Darrow some hobbies, please! Battles got the boys stressed. You always have a plan and it better be a good one. Also, sorry about the echo. Dan just moved so he is still setting up his professional recording booth. Special thanks to
- [Dark Age: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/dark-age-part-three/) - Dan needs a little bit more training for these big giant death machines (9:27 to skip). Maybe everyone in this book is just a LITTLE too chill about some unknown *potentially* alien thing. Lysander is such a loser. You heard it here first folks.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Dark Age: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/dark-age-part-two/) - Luke admits to being a quitter (6:00 to skip). Last week's episode ending on a high note so we're happy to report this section was emotionally devastating, damnit Pierce! Let us know how to get bold font and if it's ok to love Ephraim now.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Dark Age: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/dark-age-part-one/) - Still holding out hope for a home Dippin' Dots maker (12:00 to skip). Lysander is easily impressed, and Darrow is maybe back. Be physically amazing in every way or emit slightly more pheromones, pick your superpower. Also thank god for Virginia.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Iron Gold: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/iron-gold-part-three/) - Fireworks or drones (12:20 to skip)? Please, we need to see a zoladone ad. Also worst character round up this sode. Dan reveals a core value and Luke "should" be able to beat a one-armed Lebron.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Iron Gold: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/iron-gold-part-two/) - Shouts out to DJs, you've gone underappreciated for too long (7:40 to skip). Trying to keep the Darrow bashing to a minimum, but honestly it isn't easy. We have a foolproof way to escape the weird crab prison, and debut some new descriptive terminology for psycho Gold behavior. Don't sleep on our pets making multiple
- [Iron Gold: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/iron-gold-part-one/) - Don't ask anyone why they are vegetarian if you aren't ready to feel a little bit guilty (7:00 to avoid the guilt). Tough to be back, but Luke and Dan do it for the fans. The dumb nerds decide to come up with a new political system on the fly and use their expertise to
- [Waybound](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/waybound/) - To keep our spirits up on this bittersweet day Dan gets us warmed up with an update on his dance moves (9:20 to skip). Messing with time is super overpowered, but reading Fate is maybe underpowered? Multiple Drosses is awesome and also a little suspicious. Finally, we wrap up with our thoughts on the end
- [Bastion: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/bastion-part-two/) - Dan takes a stand (2:55). Sol is simultaneously way better and way worse somehow. Dan wants to know your eternal replay highlight and Luke invents the stranger protocol. Today is the day you should start farming, but beware the Tomb Spark bovine. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Bastion: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/bastion-part-one/) - Dan's laboratory skills are failing him in his quest for the perfect biscuit (9:10 to skip). We've got some critiques for the academy's methods, but in the interest of fairness there are some things they're doing right. Gruel fountains? Yes please! And if the pod doesn't work out we're gonna take up farming these black
- [Into the Labyrinth](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/into-the-labyrinth/) - We're so excited to start our progression fantasy tour that we have no warmup today. Hugh breaks a record for worst start to a book and is missing out on cool demon powers. Dan is in rare form today with both a big theory and a new business idea.Next week we continue our tour with
- [Rogue Protocol](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/rogue-protocol/) - Time to reinvent the blood pact (10:33 to skip). Luke and Dan reveal just how dystopian this future is and remind you to always backup your data. Frequently. Unless you are trying to dunk. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Artificial Condition](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/artificial-condition/) - Warmup today is about ideal social outings and our new business idea (13:15 to skip). Dino nuggies make a surprise appearance and smart appliances are getting out of control. Also why are the comfortUnits so strong??Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Graceling: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/graceling-part-two/) - Who is Leck, really? How could Po be this dumb? Who has the best plan and why does it include a net? Which captain would you rather serve under? Luke and Dan are out here asking the real questions.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Graceling: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/graceling-part-one/) - Learn a little bit about how surprisingly organized junkyards are in today's warmup (12:55 to skip). Come to our pod to focus on the important questions like how good can a Graced juggler really be? Stick around for our theories on evil councils and how the dogs are actually all OK.Special thanks to VOLO for
- [Leech: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/leech-part-two/) - We have a double warm up here starting with urban planning talk and speed running sunroofs (11:44 to skip). Big oof on this ending. Luke and Dan start by begging these rich people to stop procreating. Get yourself a hive mind barber. Also, ghosts or naw?Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.Also
- [Leach: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/leach-part-one/) - As promised Dan gives a report on the wedding and has been working on his baking skills (6:00 to skip). Your favorite leech has a problem and we're solving it by designing the perfect doctor's exam. We've also got some notes on how you survive the winter at this Chateau, and we're not giving the
- [The Stone Sky: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-stone-sky-part-two/) - A couple of mini warm ups get us taking about gadgets and books (10:15 to skip). Luke and Dan return with science talk! Get ready to hear about the worst kind of protesters and how the stone eaters may actually be the solution. Or at the very least a little bit too forward.Special thanks to
- [The Stone Sky: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-stone-sky-part-one/) - Luke attended a book festival and wants to tell you about it (7:25 to skip). If you're turning to stone, which parts go first? You know we're getting creative with it. Plus, Nassun develops a great new training method for future doctors.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Last Argument of Kings: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/last-argument-of-kings-part-three/) - Dan jumps into a warmup (10:20 to skip). The boys get called out for their love of maps and Severard gets called out for not keeping a diary. How long do you have on your personal doomsday clock for this world?Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Last Argument of Kings: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/last-argument-of-kings-part-two/) - Luke drinks whiskey at a bachelor party and wants to talk about it (12:00 to skip). The Bloody Nine is finally starting to scare us (but we still love him obvi). Also everything is Sult's fault.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Last Argument of Kings: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/last-argument-of-kings-part-one/) - The boys get back to holiday talk to warm up (12:46 to skip). Jezel is officially the king of idiots. The Northmen clearly need to start playing Dungeons and Dragons and Luke and Dan leave a bad review for this mountain fortress.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Tress of the Emerald Sea: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/tress-of-the-emerald-sea-part-three/) - Luke must face a harsh truth about his sports fanhood (10:20 to skip). Folks, does it count as a war if the Sorceress never loses. We finally get to meet a dragon in the cosmere, and... not a great guy! Finally, we make a noble attempt at a grand spore theory and tbh I think
- [Tress of the Emerald Sea: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/tress-of-the-emerald-sea-part-two/) - Luke needs more sports (10:45 to skip)! The boys get called out and it turns out Tress is a bit of a freak. Luke reveals himself to actually be a mask and Dan calls out these gull(hehe)ible pirates. What we using those crimson spores for?Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Tress of the Emerald Sea: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/tress-of-the-emerald-sea-part-one/) - Warm up today is gonna get you riled up if you're a big self-destruct button fan (12:00 to skip). Our big goal of this book is to come up with a grand scientific theory for spore reactivity and we're getting started with some classic mole fraction talk (you know you love it). Plus how willing
- [Red Seas Under Red Skies: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/red-seas-under-red-skies-part-three/) - Something fishy is going on in the Parlor Passage. Also Luke and Dan still don't get the plan. Me thinks someone needs to give these pirates some pointers. Teach em about parley. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Red Seas Under Red Skies: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/red-seas-under-red-skies-part-two/) - We know you've all wanted a fortune cookie warmup so here you go (8:20 to skip). You may think we are too critical of the pirate plan in this book, but you are wrong because WHAT IS THIS PLAN?? However, don't worry because Luke and Dan are still solving problems including Locke's cat issues. Finally,
- [Red Seas Under Red Skies: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/red-seas-under-red-skies-part-one/) - Dan starts with a hype moment and Luke calls out Locke's magic skills. Break out your IRL GameSharks because we have found a cheat code. Also, get yourself that government contract money.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Holiday Gift + Fantasy TV](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/holiday-gift-fantasy-tv/) - As promised Dan gives us an introduction to his favorite Christmas Tree scent brand (Amazon link). We're a little late, but finally giving our thoughts on the big TV shows of the year. Make sure you've seen Rings of Power and House of the Dragon before listening.We're off next week and then back in the
- [The Rook: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-rook-part-three/) - Artificial Christmas tree discussion ahead (10:30 to skip). Luke points out that the Cheque can't be the only one out there and Dan is back on his bouncy house grind. There is one big question this episode and that is, how are you finding this duck? Seriously, how?Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and
- [The Rook: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-rook-part-two/) - Warming up today with our classic love and appreciation of capitalism and how great toys are (10:35 to skip). From their SOPs to their personnel notes this organization has a lot of improvements to make and we're offering our consulting services. Time to max out the stats on random mythological creatures, and Myfanwy is missing
- [The Rook: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-rook-part-one/) - Dan regales us with a tale of woe (14:39 to skip). Off rip, where are you staying? You getting room service? What's the minibar situation? Luke unveils his two cereal system and it is potentially a game changer. Also, a lot of Dr. Crisp talk this episode, so be prepared. It is not your ears,
- [Ancillary Justice: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/ancillary-justice-part-three/) - It's the holiday season, so as is tradition it's time for us to fix one of the holidays (14:05 to skip). Dan embraces the Radch jewelry game can for sure pull off a big belt buckle. We've got the perfect counter to the magic gun used in this book. And finally, does anyone know how
- [Ancillary Justice: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/ancillary-justice-part-two/) - Dan starts this episode off with a little story time (11:00 to skip). Dan proposes a theory that everything is tea and Luke wants One Esk to be maybe a touch more empathetic. Also, what kind of ID checks are we using for the emperor? Patrons, check your messages and send us your address! We
- [Ancillary Justice: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/ancillary-justice-part-one/) - Today's warmup is an advice column and Dan needs help with his dance strategy (14:05 to skip). We're putting together a plan to befriend AIs, but only the cool, hip ones. Folks, make sure your children's songs rhyme or it doesn't count!Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [All Systems Red](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/all-systems-red/) - The long anticipated no-till agriculture warmup is finally here (11:20 to skip). Are these bot makers artisans or exploited factory workers? Luke and Dan stumble into the extinction of trivia and do some gratis white hat SecUnit penetration testing. Okay that sounded bad, the boys do NOT want to talk about the sex bots. The
- [Nona the Ninth: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/nona-the-ninth-part-two/) - Get warmed up by learning a fun fact about the Heimlich maneuver, although double-check those dates before you play trivia (10:30 to skip). Don't worry. We know and understand precisely what happened in this book and can explain it to you perfectly.Today we can announce that we worked with VOLO to design a new pod
- [Nona the Ninth: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/nona-the-ninth-part-one/) - Luke is starting a grassroots movement dedicated to improving restaurant nachos (9:32 to skip). Leave it to your astute hosts to clear up any confusion or questions about Nona the Ninth. How long are y'all waiting before you get to the wacky stuff? Luke and Dan will be holding try outs for their body buddies.Special
- [Harrow the Ninth: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/harrow-the-ninth-part-two/) - You have a mission this week: get destroyed over-the-board by a child (10:10 to skip). Your hosts are legally obligated to summarize what happened in this book because they are honestly still coming to grips with it. Luke reignites the highly contentious "what is a planet" debate. Dan needs to know about some new innovations
- [Harrow the Ninth: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/harrow-the-ninth-part-one/) - Stick around for the extra long warmup today and tell us your rules and regulations for socializing (18:35 to skip). Literally what is going on in this book folks, help us make some sense of it. Make sure to come up with your teeth art, and don't sleep on the middle school S.Special thanks to
- [Gideon the Ninth: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/gideon-the-ninth-part-two/) - Dan has a very shady fun fact about body parts to get us warmed up (7:00 to skip). Ya boys come up with their ideal secret-telling liquid and pick a Pa-bone-us. Shouts out to Tamsyn for picking the least gross part of necromancy to focus on, we thank you.We're continuing with the Locked Tomb series,
- [Gideon the Ninth: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/gideon-the-ninth-part-one/) - Dan and Luke start this episode talking about how Spiderman should be way more concerned with wage theft (8:45 to skip). In this episode we tell you when you should fight a bone lord.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Storm of Swords: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-storm-of-swords-part-four/) - It's the end of the Summer of Swords and we've got to commemorate it... Should we get a sword? Also time for initial thoughts on the new LOTR show (12:30 to skip warmup). Dan brings back everyone's favorite Tyrion theory, and we love Jamie and The Hound now. Your favorite podcasters reveal they have very
- [A Storm of Swords: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-storm-of-swords-part-three/) - Luke and Dan come out hot with a borderline problematic ageist rant. Dan wants to if it is possible for the bar of most evil to go any lower and Luke wants to know when the Westeros iPhone coming out. Tyrion come on, you know what you were doing.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro
- [A Storm of Swords: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-storm-of-swords-part-two/) - Dan betrays our childhood with a very hot take on Star Wars (7:50 to skip). Deep dive into weddings in this one; we're talking payment plans, logistics, and Tyrion's feelings. Our solution may not be perfect but we gotta figure out how to deal with captives. Also, make sure to get all your agreements in
- [A Storm of Swords: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-storm-of-swords-part-one/) - Dan holds firm in his refusal to watch any Game of Thrones content. Meanwhile Luke can't help but get hyped (9:41 to skip). This episode starts with a repeat of a classic, but quickly turns into an in depth discussion of Westeros prison reform. Dan announces his favorite character, and Luke wants someone to recognize
- [The Dragonbone Chair: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-dragonbone-chair-part-three/) - You know we are getting Eragon TV series warmed up (12:13 to skip). Simon's evil twin is revealed! Dr. Dan introduces a theory that is basically a cognitohazard at 42:10 so if you don't want any spoilers for the rest of the series, skip to 44:10. Finally, Luke and Dan spill the beans about their
- [The Dragonbone Chair: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-dragonbone-chair-part-two/) - Dan gets us started with a very hot take on everyone's favorite unforgivable curse (10:00 to skip). Simon proves that he's down for anything. We need some tips on training our wolves, and is it possible to have too much Jade?Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Dragonbone Chair: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-dragonbone-chair-part-one/) - Dan has officially committed to the bit (11:28 to skip). This episode is all about 2 things: dragging Simon and venerating a dude for eating small birds. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Dreadgod](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/dreadgod/) - Luke gets us warmed up with reports from Olive Garden (9:15 to skip). Several new segments are introduced in this episode, you know we've got to have Hype Time and get excited for our inaugural "consider this" segment. Once again we have to consider if we're on Team Vroshir or Team Abidan (or maybe Team
- [Redwall: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/redwall-part-two/) - I know this is the Summer of Swords, but the boys have a few questions about this particular sword. Plenty of characters earned a critical eye this episode. Also, Luke and Dan dive deep into the political structures of Redwall, and the Machiavellian tactics of the abbot. Dan is looking forward to returning to the
- [Redwall: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/redwall-part-one/) - It's a big throwback day as we get reacquainted with our local library and everyone's favorite childhood series. Lots of mouse talk in this one, any mouse biology experts let us know what we missed by emailing us at info@thisisntactuallymyemail.com. Plus you know we've gotta talk Redwall food which did not disappoint. Also, what exactly
- [The Sword of Shannara: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-sword-of-shannara-part-three/) - Luke and Dan hit us with a very topical rant about TV these days (11:58 to skip). Of course Dan has to start with a summary of this chapter, how would anyone know what story we are reading without one? Also what is this, a continent for ants? Once again, Dan and Luke investigate the
- [The Sword of Shannara: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-sword-of-shannara-part-two/) - Dan gets us warmed up with a riveting furniture story (7:35 to skip). Shea proves that he has very poor deduction skills, the journey through the cave has some storytelling flaws, and Menion continues to be the clear MVP.P.S. Here is the couchSpecial thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Sword of Shannara: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-sword-of-shannara-part-one/) - Luke got heated at a chemical conference so if you work for ExxonMobile, you have some explaining to do! (7:35 to skip). Dan starts us off with a summary that sounds somewhat familiar, and Luke needs some ice breakers. There is a gold nugget of a story nestled in this episode, so make the royalty
- [The Library at Mount Char: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-library-at-mount-char-part-three/) - We've got some well earned awards to give out, find out who is the worst person and who had the worst time in this book (Tip: the answers are obvious). Beware Father fans, we're ranting about your boi a whole lot this episode. Also seek help.Get ready for the Summer of Swords and start reading
- [The Library at Mount Char: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-library-at-mount-char-part-two/) - ALERT! GROCERY. STORE. WARM. UP. (7:22 skip). What is going on with the President of Mount Char? Father needs to trim the fat a bit and Dan is excited for Carolyn to hit 'em with a SLICE. Pop quiz: The Sun goes out. How much do you tip your waitress at dinner that evening?Special thanks
- [The Library at Mount Char: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-library-at-mount-char-part-one/) - Dan wants us to get warmed up with a surprise Pokemon and Disney reference (6:35 to skip). Big disagreements on this one about who has the best catalogue, whats your vote? My guy Nobununga might be kindof a dummy, but a big tiger can turn the tide in any fight. And of course we've got
- [Orconomics: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/orconomics-part-two/) - Yeehaw, Luke gets us warmed up with a rant about Western movies (7:35 to skip). Dan pops off about a comment from our subreddit and Luke finds an incredible (or terrible) opportunity for an investigative journalist. Necromancy finally getting some love and the boys are holding out for a hero.Special thanks to VOLO for the
- [Orconomics: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/orconomics-part-one/) - Huge mood shift between last week and this one, we're getting back to the funnies! Hey villains, if you're forcing someone into marriage at least have the decency to get a good venue. Dan's working on a counter-guild and Luke wants a sliding scale for bar tabs. Eat the dang elf food, Gorm!Special thanks to
- [Parable of the Sower: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/parable-of-the-sower-part-two/) - Dan has learned a key aspect of Elden Ring since the Patreon episode (7:05 to skip). Luke and Dan address a controversy right off the bat and that is how you know they are professionals. We get a peek behind the podcasting curtain and Luke shares his expert water treatment takes. Finally, based on our
- [Parable of the Sower: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/parable-of-the-sower-part-one/) - We are happy to be back with some good podcast news and a long warmup. Small dog owners beware, you're getting called out (13:45 to skip). Speaking of dogs, we may have found the right messaging for climate change deniers and dogs are key. We're sensing some west coast bias here and Dan is calling
- [Rhythm of War: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/rhythm-of-war-part-four/) - Good news, we finally get to have some dragon discourse in Stormlight, did we get the dragon checklist right? In a surprise move Dan is finally willing to give Shallan some slack on something. Hey, who is gonna be Odiums champion? It feels like there's an obvious choice...Next week we're taking a break followed by
- [Rhythm of War: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/rhythm-of-war-part-three/) - Luke gets us warmed up with an essential bathroom innovation (9:30 to skip). Brandon had a very big week last week, and we are all hyped. Can we also appreciate how insane the last decade has been on Roshar? Luke announces it is finally time to start expressing ourselves through dance instead of sword. Dan
- [Rhythm of War: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/rhythm-of-war-part-two/) - We're coming back to our favorite punching bag (cause he won't punch back), Lirin how are ya! Make sure to be concise in your letters folks or Dan is coming after you, every sentence counts. We're sewing out pockets shut from here on out and cheering on our new horse radiants.Special thanks to VOLO for
- [Rhythm of War: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/rhythm-of-war-part-one/) - The Patreon is up (https://www.patreon.com/dcitabc) be sure to check out those subscriber benefits! Dan also gives his report on the Big Bang Theory (13:15 to skip). You have GOT to read the novellas, folks. Dan is back on his theory game and Luke can finally get on board. This episode also introduces Crass Dan which
- [Dawnshard](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/dawnshard/) - We announce some podcast news and then warmup with a hot debate about everyone's favorite show The Big Bang Theory (16:15 to skip). Luke wants the sailors to unionize and Dan wants the Sleepless in charge. It wouldn't be an episode of Don't call it a book club without us theorizing about new sports and
- [Academ's Fury: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/academs-fury-part-three/) - The Marat officially have pants on fire, and Jim needs to leave Doroga alone. Also, First Lord rhymes with vord, y'all know the rest. Dan and Luke continue to be unimpressed with this government and decide what they really need is a parade. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Academ's Fury: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/academs-fury-part-two/) - It's everyone's favorite segment, we're warming up with some grocery store talk (8:50 to skip). The boys point out all of the flaws in Aleran society. Repeatedly. Luke comes out as team Aquitaine and Dan's not afraid of our rich overlords. Also, is the grey tower a myth? Time to throw some bribes around.Special thanks
- [Academ's Fury: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/academs-fury-part-one/) - Luke brags about how popular he is (6:10 to skip). The boy stand up to bullying and for once in his life, Dan doesn't propose an absurd theory. Luke gives a lesson in diplomacy and Dan gives a lesson in keeping your mouth shut when you have no idea what you are talking about.Special thanks
- [Oathbringer: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/oathbringer-part-three/) - Dan wants to learn a little "real life lore" while reading (10:55 to skip). Luke no longer stans Shallan and Dan wants to hear some details about damage and hit points. Some important discussion about who lives in Shadesmar and Dan introduces another powerful theory about Dalinar. Finishing up the book next week!Special thanks to
- [Oathbringer: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/oathbringer-part-two/) - Nothing personal but I don't want to share food with you and I have something to say about it (8:05 to skip). Now that Jasnah is back she takes a spot in the hot seat. She's a little too ready to attack our parshmen friends! Dan has some words for the heralds, and we come
- [Oathbringer: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/oathbringer-part-one/) - Apologies, but we have to talk about Lebron (8:15 to skip). Luke decides to start us off by pissing off thousands of readers everywhere and Dan goes after a world religion so a contentious start. Luke also proposes a revision to our understanding of toughness that is so needed right now. Finally, everybody get ready
- [Edgedancer](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/edgedancer/) - We're starting with a warm-up that really gets Dan upset (7:20 to skip). So many details that we've got to figure out about our new settings. How do these communal ovens work? Are we really letting people watch the Prime all the time? While we've got you here make sure to weigh in on what
- [Words of Radiance: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/words-of-radiance-part-four/) - Dan comes out swinging at these so called "geniuses". Luke is hesitant to give Dan props for called shots but we all know Dan is basically the book Nostradamus. We also should take a minute and just imagine the hype that has built up on this battlefield. Luke needs to know who has the coolest
- [Words of Radiance: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/words-of-radiance-part-three/) - We're getting warmed up with our first e-bike news segment, many more to come (7:30 to skip). Everybody share their experiences of the first time they read the arena fight scene, we've got some fun ones. Dan's got a big new theory about why the spren are bad and we try to remember why the
- [Words of Radiance: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/words-of-radiance-part-two/) - Dan gets warmed up with a crisis and Luke talks him down (10:57 to skip). The boys talk theories of justice and we get a good analysis of the parallels between Kaladin and Shallan. Hold up, is this actually an insightful book discussion? Nah, now they are talking about spit balls so don't worry about
- [Words of Radiance: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/words-of-radiance-part-one/) - Happy Thanksgiving everyone! We're getting warmed up with some holiday talk (8:40 to skip) and then talking the first quarter of Words of Radiance. Some good Bridge 4 tattoo discussion in this one, let us know if you agree with us or not! Plus who are you taking, Pattern or Syl? There's no wrong answer!Special
- [Reaper: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/reaper-part-two/) - Turns out Reaper and The Fast And Furious movies have a lot in common: both are all about fam. Dan takes a victory lap and Luke wants to know how much Eithan really matters to the team. Also, is Cradle on easy mode? Taking a week off but back for a special Thanksgiving episode starting
- [Reaper: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/reaper-part-one/) - As is tradition we've got to do some Ozriel theories before really getting started. Another tradition we're sticking closely to is requesting some non-combat-related paths! Where are they guys?! Luke is embracing the problematic Sacred Valley mindset and Dan's got some notes on the Soul Forge. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro
- [Trick or Treat!](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/trick-or-treat/) - The boys present a very special Halloween episode. Enjoy the local neighborhood!Special thanks to crickets and owls for the intro and outro music.
- [The Hollow Places: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-hollow-places-part-two/) - We're getting warmed up by reminiscing about what brought us back into fantasy (6:00 to skip), let us know what books rejuvenated your fantasy career! Luke wants to take over financial management duties for the museum and Dan breaks down the themes for us. Lastly, we've got some words for our museum benefactor.Next week we're
- [The Hollow Places: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-hollow-places-part-one/) - Dan has a nightmare and is sort of hyped. This episode celebrates great innovations in prank history and cursed item storage. Dan appreciates Simon's style and Luke spots an opportunity for the museum. Also, Luke has the most absurd idea for scary dimension graffiti. At the halfway mark Dan is seriously wondering, what is even
- [Foundation: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/foundation-part-two/) - Is the Foundation TV show living up to our expectations? It's complicated and we have a lot of thoughts (skip to 19:40 if you haven't watched the show). The book may repetitive but we are not! Although we're talking themes a LOT in this episode. Finally, how are we keeping the Foundation citizens from being
- [Foundation: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/foundation-part-one/) - Luke is making fantastic latte art on the Twitter (@DCitaBC) and Dan has some hot hands he apparently needs to talk about (6:09 to skip). The boys will be watching the Foundation show tomorrow and talking about it next episode so if you can steal someone's Apple TV password, give it a watch. This episode
- [Nice Dragons Finish Last: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/nice-dragons-finish-last-part-two/) - Very long intro today, we're learning all about RenFest and why Dan can't wait to go back (13:10 to skip). As we finish the book we're covering some big topics like Dragon Capitalism and beauty standards for beings with multiple forms. I know, very relatable and topical. We're also learning the benefits of a modern
- [Nice Dragons Finish Last: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/nice-dragons-finish-last-part-one/) - The boys give a sci-fi/fantasy news update and they are hyped. Skip to 9:05 if you have already heard of the new Foundation TV series. Big tone shift from Malazan Book of the Summer here and Luke and Dan love it. Luke gives simultaneously great and terrible advice about dragon snacks and Dan is team
- [Malazan Books 1-3 (ft. Ten Very Big Books Podcast)](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/malazan-books-1-3-ft-ten-very-big-books-podcast/) - Malazan Book of the Summer ends on a high note as Pete and AJ from the Ten Very Big Books Podcast join to talk about the series. Some fun games, hot takes, and even a few deep comments; we do it all in this one! Check out the Ten Very Big Books Podcast if you
- [Memories of Ice: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/memories-of-ice-part-four/) - In the penultimate episode of Malazan Book of the Summer, Luke gives a much needed perspective shift. Dan finds his limit for quitting army, and the boys throw a little shade on some of our main characters. Next week Pete and AJ from the Ten Very Big Books podcast will be on the pod, so
- [Memories of Ice: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/memories-of-ice-part-three/) - We cover a lot of ground in this one, from Jamba Juice employees to archaeologists, there's something for everyone. The boys continue the critique of the Tlan Imass mission statement and throw out some hot takes about Itkovian and Caladan Brood. Finally, what would you do at this second gathering? It feels like a lot
- [Memories of Ice: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/memories-of-ice-part-two/) - Dan and Luke warm up by doing movie/tv/game executives' jobs for them (7:33 to skip). The boys talk etiquette for turning down human flesh at a BBQ and ask important questions about the effectiveness of the Malazan army. We also need innovation among morticians and magical trading caravans, we are open to suggestions. Special thanks
- [Memories of Ice: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/memories-of-ice-part-one/) - Opening with our conflicting thoughts on Bo Burnham's new special today (10:50 to skip to the book). Elder gods are back baby and we've got that deep analysis on their downfalls. The olympics are here and you know we gotta talk sports. How much better would this world be if we had some sports to
- [Deadhouse Gates: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/deadhouse-gates-part-three/) - The boys start with some obligatory Space Jam II predictions (9:28 to skip). Wuff, wuff this Chain of Dogs is barking and it has a pretty emo vibe if we are being honest. Dan gives credit to a great insult which leads into an actually somewhat serious discussion about authority. Also, what even is death
- [Deadhouse Gates: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/deadhouse-gates-part-two/) - We're getting all of our foodie takes out for the warmup this time (6:00 to skip). Shouts out to Coltaine and the Wickans, great vibes and flexes all around (minus the whole sharpened teeth thing). Big debate in this episode about shapeshifting, is the spicy cologne good or bad? Also we may have jumped the
- [Deadhouse Gates: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/deadhouse-gates-part-one/) - The boys return with a hot take about the most beautiful game out there (8:53 to skip). The Malazan empire grows pretty dark in this book but the boys are holding out hope for some cotton candy bugs or something to come out. Dan and Luke argue about the merits of Redblade innovations and neither
- [Gardens of the Moon: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/gardens-of-the-moon-part-three/) - Luke and Dan decide it's time to get hype again (7:15 to skip). Dan loves Oponn's style and Luke reminds us that in fact, dogs are the best people. The boys talk about complicated romances and absurd dueling regulations. Turns out Luke is on the side of Big Tumor and Dan has a huge change
- [Gardens of the Moon: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/gardens-of-the-moon-part-two/) - Dan comes up with a profound observation about the nature of good and evil to start us off (7:09 to skip). Murillio has got the V I B E S and Crokus is thinking with his downstairs brain a little much. Luke wants to give a little career advice to Paran and Dan calls b.s.
- [Gardens of the Moon: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/gardens-of-the-moon-part-one/) - Today we're talking about all the important bits from the first 6 chapters, like how much you should spend on candles and how regular long hair turns into a mane. Paran is the big winner from our first episode, and we've fixed Darujhistan. You're welcome.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Lost War: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-lost-war-part-three/) - Luke and Dan check out the first 3 episodes of the new Netflix show, Shadow and Bone (skip to 13:55 to avoid spoilers). Aranock starts this section off with a pretty shitty decision that Dan can't let slide and Samily needs to make a guest appearance on the show. The boys come up with some
- [The Lost War: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-lost-war-part-two/) - Another classic segment of Dan explains it to Luke, what are we doing with Mynygogg you guys? Time for Rasa to ask for a raise cause she has MVP potential for sure. Also we're critiquing a lot of the characters in this section, check out who we think needs to be taken down a peg.Special
- [The Lost War: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-lost-war-part-one/) - To warm up Dan makes a quick retraction and Luke become a wedding registry innovator. Seriously, though why has no one done this yet? (11:17 to skip). Dan asks some important questions about the future of bed, and Luke takes us on a journey back to high school. Murders and scams abound and the boys
- [The Obelisk Gate: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-obelisk-gate-part-two/) - Dan's bringing us back to our roots with a super-specific rant about mundane life events (10:20 to skip). We finished the book for this episode so make sure you've read the whole thing before starting. Ok, now you can dive in and discuss with us who is allowed to initiate the cannibalism and who has
- [The Obelisk Gate: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-obelisk-gate-part-one/) - Luke and Dan are not very excited about one of these characters coming back, can you guess which one it is? Finally we get a name for a new segment on the show; introducing Creative Solutions with Luke and Dan. Luke also reigns in Dan before he tries to claim that all plants should have
- [Bloodline](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/bloodline/) - Will Wight continues to impress with his ability to make the power scale in his stories absolutely absurd. In our return to Sacred Valley, we've got a lot of feelings and spend some time sifting through them. Are we hyped? Frustrated? Proud? Let us know how you felt when reading this book by checking out
- [Bonus Episode: Anticipation for Bloodline](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/bonus-episode-anticipation-for-bloodline/) - Check out this short bonus episode to get ready for our full Bloodline episode coming out tomorrow! This one is all about our big expectations for the newest Cradle book.
- [Seveneves: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/seveneves-part-three/) - Dan has the number one podcast rant of all time this week (3:45 to skip). A lot of learning about space stuff in this book so hope y'all are ready for the pop quiz! Credit is finally given where it is due but no forgiveness is forthcoming. Luke and Dan fix this wack society; it
- [Seveneves: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/seveneves-part-two/) - We're once again warming up with TV about high school, too much cringe! (8:30 to skip). Oh look, your supervisor is trying to turn your workplace into a military dictatorship. It happens. But not always a good idea! And yeah, we know why you're here and we're just as angry about Julia as you are.
- [Seveneves: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/seveneves-part-one/) - Luke and Dan finally weigh in on the Potato Head controversy.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Before They Are Hanged: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/before-they-are-hanged-part-three/) - Any First Law conversation is amiss without some good Glokta analysis, buddy you know there are other jobs, right? Big shoutout to Joe for explaining the Shanka's eating habits, but now we gotta dig deeper to figure out where my microbes at. Colonel West has some strange preferences, and building a boat at the end
- [Before They Are Hanged: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/before-they-are-hanged-part-two/) - Y'all have heard of snow mirages right? Huge problem up in north Angland, trust us. Luke and Dan can't decide if Glokta has done a good job or a bad job, but Dan is still team Glokta and hoping that isn't going to come back to bite him. Luke provides great analysis about Jezal and
- [Before They Are Hanged: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/before-they-are-hanged-part-one/) - Very long but important intro, learn something about dogs in this one guys (skip to 16:15 to get to the book). Forgive us if we forget or repeat things from the first book, but y'all, how great is Glokta?! And also maybe Prince Ladisla is good? Finally, shoutout to Euz for being the worst father
- [The Traitor Baru Cormorant: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-traitor-baru-cormorant-part-three/) - Dan recounts his tale of woe in Old School Runescape (follow us on Twitch for the upcoming stream or skip 5:57 if you are a noob). Luke teaches Dan how to properly scare horses while Dan reminds Luke what happened in the plot of the book he supposedly just finished. Luke and Dan discuss what
- [The Traitor Baru Cormorant: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-traitor-baru-cormorant-part-two/) - Dan's latest Star Wars rant is all about calling BS on Obi Wan, c'mon Obi Cruise you're better than that (6:55 to skip). Two questions for you after reading this section: Is it worth getting scurvy if you can feel like a wolf for the winter? And are you coming to our fire focaccia party?We're
- [The Traitor Baru Cormorant: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-traitor-baru-cormorant-part-one/) - Blackbird182 wants to remind everyone about a certain game before we get into the book (9:57 to skip). Dan gives everyone a pass to come back to these episodes when things in "real world" are less depressing. That said, Luke and Dan are morbidly curious about how this empire functions. These peasants have got to
- [The Order of the Pure Moon Reflected in Water: Part 2](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-order-of-the-pure-moon-reflected-in-water-part-2/) - Travis from The Fantasy Inn Podcast joins us to finish our discussion on The Order of the Pure Moon Reflected in Water. Check out Part 1 on their website! The story is short so you know we've got time to speculate. What's your role in a bandit group and is getting teleportation powers worth the
- [The True Bastards: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-true-bastards-part-three/) - Alright keeping it a buck here, no one will blame you for skipping the intro this week (6:27). Luke and Dan rethink their ranking of the warriors from the Lot Lands and get into some serious statistics. Dan pushes back against Luke's criticism of Tine leadership and Luke decides we have a hot new reality
- [The True Bastards: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-true-bastards-part-two/) - Today's warmup focuses on our complacency in menu innovation (skip to 7:30 if you'll hear no criticisms of fast food). Big apologies to Fetch and Oats are due, turns out they did get pretty creative with fundraising. No one is asking but we've got some constructive criticism for the Pits of Homage and have developed
- [The True Bastards: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-true-bastards-part-one/) - Things are ROUGH for these half-orcs y'all so it's a good thing they are all optimistic and encouraging! Dan thinks we need some new priorities in Winsome, while Luke proves to be a much more discerning reader than Dan. Who is this skinny turd boy and why is he the key to everything? Lastly, for
- [The Way of Kings: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-way-of-kings-part-four/) - Looks like Dan's plan for sneaking spheres is out, but never give up folks. Research funding must be way down in Alethi society right now because we don't know anything about these Parshendi and it's wild! Also Dan finally convinces Luke not to wear frillies on the plains. Brandon never disappoints with finales so stick
- [The Way of Kings: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-way-of-kings-part-three/) - Luke hits us with a blast from the past (6:20 to skip). Dan suggests a silver lining to chasm duty and Luke is *emotional*. We also find out why Luke isn't a regular blood donor or a member of the Heralds. Also, Dan actually provides some real life knowledge in this episode. Finally, the best
- [The Way of Kings: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-way-of-kings-part-two/) - To get us warmed up Dan wants to reframe our generational nerd terminology (skip to 7:30 for book discussion). Bring Luke some frilly laces to throw on under his jacket, it honestly looks great and Dalinar needs to refine his arguments a little. Dan is sick and tired of us exploiting our limited natural resources.
- [The Way of Kings: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-way-of-kings-part-one/) - Of course Luke and Dan are gonna talk about the limitations of having a safehand and the power of these eyebrows. Luke points out which spren would be the most embarrassing to see and Dan postulates about what to transform this rock into. Finally, this family doesn't need money they need therapy ASAP. Happy Holidays!Special
- [Rage of Dragons: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/rage-of-dragons-part-three/) - Today we're starting off with a rant that everyone is going to relate to (skip to 6:30 for Rage of Dragons). I'm not the bravest person in the world but surrendering in this case seems great, right? Also find out why Tau is all brawn and no brains and who is winning in the demon
- [Rage of Dragons: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/rage-of-dragons-part-two/) - Dan may have his dumbest warm-up rant yet and Luke decides to add his own magic to the mix (9:45 to skip). Dan is pissed about the Chosen's abstinence only education BS. Luke isn't very on board with these "Gifted" and the boys take a strong position against ableism. Also if anyone can send us
- [Rage of Dragons: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/rage-of-dragons-part-one/) - If you were worried about Dan after last episode let us put your fears to rest before getting to the book. Finally we're back to dragons, and we're already going deep into the pros and cons of dragon scale swords. Big winner for this section; wood! Have we been underrating good quality wood? And yes
- [Furies of Calderon: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/furies-of-calderon-part-three/) - Luke is concerned that he may be sharing too much, and Dan definitely shares too much (please skip to 6:00). Dan needs to get deeper into a comment from the subreddit. Luke and Dan have some suggestions for this empire, mostly fortifications based. Lastly, but most importantly, smash the patriarchy. First third of The Rage
- [Furies of Calderon: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/furies-of-calderon-part-two/) - A double warmup for this episode, skip to 9:40 if you're only interested in Furies of Calderon. Dan updates his Tavi theory and brings us way out on a limb. Bernard is coming off way too good in this book so we've got to take him down a peg or two. And Dan has a
- [Furies of Calderon: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/furies-of-calderon-part-one/) - Did anything exciting happen this week? Luke and Dan can't think of anything (4:50 to skip). Dan leads Luke immediately astray on the pronunciation of Amara's name but they are sticking with it. Are these Cursors extremely busy or extremely lazy? Dan wants to know why fantasy worlds are so in love with dictatorships and
- [To Sleep in a Sea of Stars: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/to-sleep-in-a-sea-of-stars-part-three/) - Incredibly hot take to open this one, skip to 5:30 if you don't want to get mad at Luke and just want to hear about the ending of to Sleep in a Sea of Stars. We're changing our vote for most overrated characters and I feel pretty good about the newest candidates. Also let's talk
- [To Sleep in a Sea of Stars: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/to-sleep-in-a-sea-of-stars-part-two/) - Cryotubes: do we want them or naw? Luke wants to talk about the most boring part of this book AGAIN. Also, Kira clearly needs to get a face tattoo and Dan is hoping for this book to take a radical turn near the end. Who the eff is approving hornets? Goodbye, little insect.Special thanks to
- [To Sleep in a Sea of Stars: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/to-sleep-in-a-sea-of-stars-part-one/) - This is a long book and we read a third of it so make sure you get to Part II Chapter 11 before listening. As always Dan is incredibly suspicious and wants us to question everything. We go deep into some of the details of the new technology. For example these neural implants, are you
- [Wintersteel: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/wintersteel-part-two/) - Luke and Dan shout out correct predictions from the /r/Iteration110Cradle subreddit (follow us on twitter @DCitaBC for those embarrassing tweets). Dan thinks Mercy got a raw deal and Luke reveals some of the underlying variables behind the creation of Crusher. Also get ready for a discussion of the moral implications of what Lindon and Yerin
- [Wintersteel: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/wintersteel-part-one/) - To mark the excitement of the new Cradle book Dan is starting this episode with a great theory addressing a classic Cradle question. We're diving deep into the politics of this world; find out what major policy Eithan is endorsing. Next week we're finishing Wintersteel, keep an eye out for any correctly predicted theories!Special thanks
- [Wintersteel Fan Theories](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/wintersteel-fan-theories/) - Luke and Dan disprove a whole barrel of theories from the /r/Iteration110Cradle subreddit in anticipation of the Wintersteel release tomorrow. The rules: 1. If Luke or Dan can refute any part of the comment, they have disproven your theory. 2. If anyone's theory or prediction is correct, Luke and Dan will tweet and embarrassing fact
- [Napolean Dynamite](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/napolean-dynamite/) - Hey remember Napolean Dynamite? We decided to give it a rewatch and share our thoughts. We're digging deep into all of the scenes that you thought were meaningless. No spoilers here but this episode is just a bundle of joy. Give it a watch and then tune in.Thank you to BurghRecords for the futuristic sound
- [Sword of Kaigen: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/sword-of-kaigen-part-three/) - To get warmed up today Dan goes on a rollercoaster of emotions with his perspective on gift cards (skip to 8:45 for book discussion). As we finish up the Sword of Kaigen we're again diving deep into the macroeconomics and incentives of the communities in a book. If you've got a moment please spare a
- [Sword of Kaigen: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/sword-of-kaigen-part-two/) - Can you guess who Luke and Dan are going to be dunking on for most of this episode? Probably because he is an absolute monster. The boys speculate about the amazing non-combat uses of water magic, specifically the cuisine. Be warned, there is a little bit of toilet humor in this episode but I promise
- [Sword of Kaigen: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/sword-of-kaigen-part-one/) - Dan doesn't understand the concept of a warm up so don't skip the intro on this one . Luke has a fool proof method of winning one of these duels and it's all about climate control folks. Dan asks the age old question; why are we using swords? And yes we do have an answer...
- [Short Stories by JY Neon Yang (feat. Colored Pages Book Club)](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/short-stories-by-jy-neon-yang-feat-colored-pages-book-club/) - Luke and Dan join forces with Ako and Marci of the Colored Pages Book Club to talk about Auspicium Melioris Aevi and Patterns of a Murmuration, In Billions of Data Points by JY Neon Yang. This is one of the smartest discussions on this entire podcast; the squad talks about the implications of capitalism on
- [The Black Prism: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-black-prism-part-three/) - How much you wanna make a bet Luke could throw a football over them mountains? (4:05 to skip the Napoleon Dynamite fan segment) Dan is still not convinced about the goodness or badness of these brothers and Luke needs to be on the committee designing this wall. We also desperately need an answer as to
- [The Black Prism: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-black-prism-part-two/) - Orholam sent a message via recording issues that a warm up will not be welcome in this episode so we jump straight into the book. A certain clothing based prank gives us some more fuel for our good brother/bad brother debate and honestly it's not looking good. We love to see the inclusion of some
- [The Black Prism: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-black-prism-part-one/) - Luke starts us off with some serious introvert energy (7:00 to skip this karaoke rant). Luke and Dan already have a few suggestions for how to improve this prison. It may involve Eiffel 65. Dan learns about a new fitness contraption and Luke gives a glowing endorsement of King Garadul. Just kidding, this guy is
- [On the Shoulders of Titans: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/on-the-shoulders-of-titans-part-three/) - Dan brings back a beloved segment, find out the connection between business suits and water parks (or skip to 8:30). Luke is a huge fan of alley-oops in fights as well as well timed winks while Dan can't believe Corin's final exam score and is more convinced than ever of Sera's guilt. Finally, we get
- [On the Shoulders of Titans: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/on-the-shoulders-of-titans-part-two/) - You are the top first year enchanter at the Lorian Heights Academy. You have studied hard to get to the top and had to sacrifice to keep up your grades but the reward is well worth it. After acing your finals you take a well deserved break and spend an hour relaxing with a cup
- [On the Shoulders of Titans: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/on-the-shoulders-of-titans-part-one/) - Tons of questions this week about the curriculum in our schools, We're starting to get concerned that the bow and arrow lobby has too much power. Dan is turning in his spider accusation a little bit early, we feel good about getting some points towards graduation for that. Speaking of which, can we give our
- [Sufficiently Advanced Magic: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/sufficiently-advanced-magic-part-three/) - Luke and Dan start by addressing some comments from /r/climberscourt. Also, Luke mentions Patrick is a Shaper which is definitely wrong (he is an Elementalist, bruh) and you should definitely point it out to him in some way this week. Once again the boys criticize the teaching styles of the professors in the academy. The
- [Sufficiently Advanced Magic: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/sufficiently-advanced-magic-part-two/) - Thanks to everyone sending us your thoughts on the last episode, keep 'em coming by commenting on our reddit posts on the r/dontcallitabookclub or r/ClimbersCourt subreddits, tweeting us @DCitaBC, or checking out our facebook page. Dan is excited that we're giving enchanters some credit, but Luke pumps the brakes on becoming superfans. You've heard it
- [Sufficiently Advanced Magic: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/sufficiently-advanced-magic-part-one/) - Dan needs to know why Harry Potter never got Lasik (skip to 6:12 if you don't). Luke and Dan want a class revolution in Valia. They also start learning about our boy Corin, and he is either right where he needs to be and crushing it, or about to completely lose everything he wants and
- [Circe: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/circe-part-three/) - A lot of questions and healthy debate over our boy Trygon. Cool or no? Tell us your thoughts by tweeting us @DCitaBC or commenting on our subreddit r/dontcallitabookclub. Now that Odysseus has gone down can we call some of his stories into question? We've got some theories on what really happened on the journey home.
- [Circe: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/circe-part-two/) - Very relatable rant today that all cooks will appreciate (skip to 5:10 if you've never cooked anything and just want to hear about Circe). Can we take just a few things off Daedalus's plate? My guy is the Greg Jennings of the Greek world. Oh c'mon, how do you not get that reference? And we
- [Circe: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/circe-part-one/) - No spoilers today so if you haven't read up to chapter 11 stay away! Although if you're someone who can get spoiled by this book we want to hear your story, tweet at us with the hashtag #GreekSpoilers. A lot of strange sexual fantasies in this book so far and we focus on some you
- [Morning Star: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/morning-star-part-three/) - Luke gets us warmed up with a Red Rover rant that is so on point (5:49). The boys want to see something cooler than a parrot. Luke takes an extremely bold stance and of course Dan tries to circle back to a venom stinger. An important question we need answered, are there memes in space?
- [Morning Star: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/morning-star-part-two/) - The rants are back! Listen to Luke's very hot take about recipe blogs (or skip to 10:10 for book discussion). Dan is loving this book, but we do have one issue: Darrow you don't get to be Howler 1! Congrats to Sefi for making her vow of silence count, and it's time to put away
- [Morning Star: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/morning-star-part-one/) - Dan reminds Darrow that his situation isn't really *that* bad. The boys have no idea where the Society's obsession with hummingbirds comes from but can't wait to see this Reaper hype video. While Luke isn't feeling great about his Jackal theory, Dan takes a much deserved victory lap. Also, the Boneriders have to know, right?
- [Golden Son: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/golden-son-part-three/) - Dan thinks that Darrow has a great future in the WWE, and we have another what's in the box situation on our hands. Luke has an issue with Darrow's big reveal, and apparently still believes in Jackal?? And sorry robot haters, you can't keep 'em down forever.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro
- [Golden Son: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/golden-son-part-two/) - Dan wants to know why no one in Sci-Fi seems to be concerned with deepfakes (book discussion starts at 4:50). So the box didn't contain a Bop-It, but we need some serious play-testing on this "game" before it is released. We speculate on the identity of Ares and this book is getting #emotional *NOT clickbait*.
- [Golden Son: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/golden-son-part-one/) - Darrow and the Red Rising series are back! Read up to chapter 15 for this episode and then stop if you’re an insane person like us. We get excited to meet Julian’s mother and human cactus, Mrs. Bellona who has managed to maintain a 2 year long hunger strike. Hats off to Fitchner for his
- [The Vagrant: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-vagrant-part-three/) - Luke and Dan recommend podcasts they have been listening to during quarantine. If you don't want to hear us talk about Bambi and Chocolate Bear, the book discussion starts at 5:49. Goose with a venom stinger vs an ornery goat: who's got your money? We finally get someone who knows how to make a deal
- [The Vagrant: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-vagrant-part-two/) - We’re getting everybody involved with our first listener submitted rant (skip to 11:45 if sneezing isn’t relatable to you). The Uncivil is looking pretty smart right now, but be honest folks, would you have invested early? Seems like a risky business strategy. And we're once again asking the real questions: are goats predator or prey?Special
- [The Vagrant: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-vagrant-part-one/) - In a return to form, Dan starts the episode with a profound observation on an everyday issue (5:58 to skip the rant). This world sounds absolutely terrible (#relatable, am I right), but Luke and Dan are very intrigued by the details. Also, what is keeping the Seven so busy that they couldn't send more than
- [Uncrowned](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/uncrowned/) - Since everyone has so much extra time at home (stay safe everybody) we’ve got an extra long episode to round out our Cradle marathon. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take so we let it rip with our Sacred Valley theories. Is it just me or do the Vroshir have a case? We’re
- [Underlord](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/underlord/) - Dan gets pretty heated (some would say too heated) about some past comments (we love em). Luke and Dan puzzle out who we are rooting for in this series. Luke has some very important questions about Eithan (firstly, who is he hiding in there) and we need to get an invite to the Akura Halloween
- [Skysworn](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/skysworn/) - With the death of one theory, another arises to take its place. Also, we have a few questions about y'alls alternative Jai Chen theory and we need answers. Luke reminds us that everythiing about this duel is insane. Dan needs to know how to game the algorithm to up his style rank. Oh and by
- [Blackflame](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/blackflame/) - Name pronunciation is one of the few things we don't excel at and we admit (some of) our mistakes then address other comments from listeners. Send us more comments via twitter (@DCitaBC), email (dcbc@dontcallitabookclub.com), or on the /r/iteration110Cradle subreddit. We explain how it's about time the janitors surpass the warriors in society, and finish with
- [Soulsmith](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/soulsmith/) - Upon advancing to the peak of Soulsmith, the boys find they are overflowing with podcast madra. Dan and Luke respond to fellow sacred artists from /r/Iteration110Cradle. Keep sending us suggested topics (@DCitaBC, dcbc@dontcallitabookclub.com, or comment on the upcoming reddit post)! Dan is obviously on the path of controversial theories and Luke seems to be leaning
- [Unsouled](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/unsouled/) - We begin our Cradle journey here with theories, nitpicks, and character critiques. What's up with Elder Whisper? How wrong was Lindon's choice of treasure? What can the tournament arena tell us about the Wei clan? We've got the answers. Get in touch with us if you've got comments on Unsouled or suggested topics for our
- [Red Rising: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/red-rising-part-three/) - This week on The Institute, tales of woe and heartbreak, triumph and glory, vengeance and betrayal. Be sure to tweet #RedRisingRealityShow with your vote for who should win this season! Your humble producers, Luke and Dan, suggest a new luxury pet that is bound to be all the rage. And we ask the all important
- [Red Rising: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/red-rising-part-two/) - Coming out of the gates swingin on this one with a very specific rant about hummus (if you couldn't care less about hummus skip to 9:50). If you made fun of Dan for his venom stinger request last week buckle up for his victory lap. Both of us choose to be pixies instead of going
- [Red Rising: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/red-rising-part-one/) - Daniel gets worked up about how much everyone is talking about a certain wellness brand that will not be named (take Dan's advice, lets just all agree to not talk about it and skip to 7:28 for Red Rising). Luke and Dan immediately violate their sacred code of ethics and reveal they are very into
- [The Raveling: Alec Hutson Interview](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-raveling-alec-hutson-interview/) - In a surprise twist, Alec comes back on the pod to talk our thoughts on The Raveling, grape seeds, and what is next in the Hutson universe. Don't miss Alec revealing jaw dropping truths about his trilogy you won't hear anywhere else! Next week we are reading Red Rising by Pierce Brown, so polish off
- [The Shadow King: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-shadow-king-part-three/) - In this final episode of The Raveling series Luke and Dan talk giant doors and Cho Lin gets a reality check. If anyone knows why smells are less smelly when its cold please hit us up. If you don't bring chalk into a dungeon, you are officially a scrub. The boys also give a wrap
- [The Shadow King: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-shadow-king-part-two/) - Apologies to Senacus for anything mean ever said about you. We take it back you are just the sweetest. We're also taking back anything positive said about our immortal squad, let us explain why. And if you're Lask how much cannibalistic experimenting are you doing? I'm betting a lot. We've danced around this point for
- [The Shadow King: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-shadow-king-part-one/) - Luke gives out a free e-reader innovation: quick map access. We love a good map (skip to 4:16 if you couldn't care less about maps). First things first, if you are a prologue skipper get at us (@DCitaBC) and please explain yourself. The boys come down on Keilan, but he is being just a little
- [Shadows for Silence in the Forests of Hell](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/shadows-for-silence-in-the-forests-of-hell/) - Wow, who knew we could find a new nugget of Harry Potter to open with (go to 9:00 to skip this intro). First, let's talk head shapes on Threnody cause Brandon tries to sneak a wild one by us. Business advice for Silence, theories on undiscovered rules, we've got it all. Tell us your thoughts
- [The Silver Sorceress: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-silver-sorceress-part-three/) - Having a dope home library: great. Having a dope home library without knowing how to read: not great. And why are we still ok with the same ol' scrying basin. Listen to find out what kind of improvements to make to yours at home. Finally, Niara I'm gonna need to hear some stronger food innovations
- [The Silver Sorceress: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-silver-sorceress-part-two/) - Gobble gobble, Dan complains about characters not getting minor illnesses (feel free to skip to the book discussion 8:14). We need one of these immortal sorcerers to come on the pod. We have a lot of questions about their choices. If anyone has them digits, DM us @DCitaBC. Luke looks on the bright side of
- [The Silver Sorceress: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-silver-sorceress-part-one/) - Buckle up for a conspiracy theory heavy episode, this one gets a little wild. The technological wonders of umbrellas are discussed, and we even lay out our plan for a world with real giant turtles.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Grey Bastards: Jonathan French Interview](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-grey-bastards-jonathan-french-interview/) - Honestly, one of the most legitimately informative episodes we have ever recorded thanks to Jonathan French. Want to know how the Sludgeman travels around the Lots? Need an answer for your theory about Jackal's lineage? Do you want to stop being eaten alive by mosquitoes every summer? These questions and more finally answered! We talk
- [Call of Duty 62: Podcast Warfare](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/call-of-duty-62-podcast-warfare/) - No book today so this episode is jam-packed with topics. Literally. Like we actually talk jam conspiracies before giving our video game takes.(10:00). Place bets on which one of us is better at video games before listening, we answer it pretty clearly. Which of your childhood games was actually terrible? Tweet angrily at Dan for
- [The Grey Bastards: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-grey-bastards-part-three/) - Just in time for Halloween, Dan and Luke hit you with some of the best/worst fantasy couples costumes. Hit us up @DCitaBC with your entry in the #fantasycouplescontest. Or skip right to the hawg talk (13:22). First things first, there have got to be ugly elves, right? There has GOT to be an Ugfuck elf
- [The Grey Bastards: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-grey-bastards-part-two/) - The Bastards have a wild government. As well respected fantasy constitutional scholars we've got your questions covered with in depth analysis. Also interested in civil engineering? Dan uses his wall building expertise to call out the Orc propaganda. And if you're looking to pad that slophead resume a little get yourself an internship at that
- [The Grey Bastards: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-grey-bastards-part-one/) - Your favorite podcasting frails get right into the mud with some of these dirty hogs. Luke and Dan have already fallen head over heels for Ugfuck. Don't believe the lies; orcs float. Also, we can all agree the half-orcs are over complicating things. Keep it simple, slophead! Finally, the boys congratulate Jackal on his sweet
- [Jade City: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/jade-city-part-three/) - Did Luke and Dan get replaced by serous book critics? Good question Jessica but no. We just get really into the weeds on character analysis in this one. Actually now that I think about it there wasn't that much dumb stuff in this episode. Really just one brief aside about Shae's apartment furniture. Not bad.Special
- [Jade City: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/jade-city-part-two/) - Luke and Dan decide the FEMA in Janloon needs an complete restructuring. Luke thinks everyone needs to get just a little bit more hype. Okay maybe a lot more hype. Dan starts development on the custom Yelp plugin for Janloon, and Luke makes an absurdly hot take. This one is a doozy. Shae, you definitely
- [Jade City: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/jade-city-part-one/) - The boys are officially #TeamHilo. Sure he has his faults, but gosh darn it he is just so genuine. Also not to split our allegiances but we are so down with #BuscemiClan. Luke and Dan reveal that Anden isn't potty trained and probably has no intention of learning. Finally, we have an important PSA: Jade
- [The Fall of Hyperion: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-fall-of-hyperion-part-three/) - You arrive at the Prancing Pony in the middle of a stormy night. Do you take the comfort and security of a booth, or do you go with the flexibility and convenience of a table. Tweet at us @DCitaBC (11:35). Luke and Dan finally get to the big questions. What makes us human? Can a
- [The Fall of Hyperion: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-fall-of-hyperion-part-two/) - The hot issue of the day: Are people that ride obnoxiously loud motorcycles in quiet neighborhoods underrepresented in fantasy literature? Of course they are (7:30). We've all got hobbies, Dan for example enjoys a nice scenic potty break. But we've figured out what the Shrike likes to do with his free time, and it's not
- [The Fall of Hyperion: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-fall-of-hyperion-part-one/) - Listen to the soothing, dulcet tones of Luke and Dan as they offer some much needed strategic advice to the Hegemony. Breathe deep, and allow yourself to be lulled into relaxation imagining the most delicious grey soup served among the treetops. Slowly close your eyes, and drift into slee -- frozen sand pelts your face
- [Sword of Destiny: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/sword-of-destiny-part-two/) - Dan reveals his tough on crime approach to Harry Potter (9:32) before joining Luke this THURSDAY in a tag team SUPER SLAM against the ridiculous number of sexual assaults in the last three stories of this book. Dan has to explain destiny yet again (see discussion of prophecy, Touch of Iron part III) and Luke
- [Sword of Destiny: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/sword-of-destiny-part-one/) - We're going back to the Witcher story with this one and also back to the personal economics lessons. Listen in for classics such as rants about Geralt's negotiating skills, and Dan attempting to solve all of the problems (of Mimics this time). Lastly, can we all stage an intervention for Geralt about his relationship with
- [The Last Wish](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-last-wish/) - Make sure to read the entirety of The Last Wish by Andrzej Sapkowski for this one! We've always considered ourselves big policy wonks so finally we could get into the weeds of the tax code. More specifically the tax code on sorcery. If that's too detailed for you we also go big picture and discuss
- [The Blade Itself: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-blade-itself-part-three/) - Our one year Anniversary is here! And Dan would like to celebrate it by rescinding his terrible hot take (3:17). We could not wait to talk about the Bloody Nine so hear us gush about a great fight scene very early on in the episode. Although somehow I think we gushed about Bremer dan Gorst
- [The Blade Itself: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-blade-itself-part-two/) - Dan decides to start this episode with a very hot take about scooters. I don't know why. Yeah, you can skip it and tell him how dumb it was (ends at 9:40). Glokta is a popular character but he deserves some criticism, right? Tell us if you think our criticism of him is deserved. We
- [The Blade Itself: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-blade-itself-part-one/) - We are back! If you've been frustrated that we don't talk about book news enough we brought in some experts. Rhonda and Erin from Pop DNA talk to us about the controversy around Guidebook for Mortals... er, Playbook to Mortals... whatever it's called (21:10). After that we get back to our bread and butter: talking
- [Touch of Iron: Timandra Whitecastle Interview](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/touch-of-iron-timandra-whitecastle-interview/) - In the words of a wise author, "Garbage in, garbage out but I say if you put good stuff in, you get good stuff out." Well on this episode, Timandra Whitecastle somehow manages to take garbage in and send good stuff out! We talk about the fine art of whittling, cursing in fantasy, and a
- [Touch of Iron: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/touch-of-iron-part-three/) - In this steamy last section we talk surprisingly long about the ideal bad boy vibe, listen through to the end for a very hot take. If you're looking for advice on your office decor, we're here for you. We can help you with the throne room that fits your personality whether you are a powerful,
- [Touch of Iron: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/touch-of-iron-part-two/) - Find out which dragon book man the boys get too excited about for the warm up (8:58). Luke hijacks Dan's theory about Diaz and charts a course for a forbidden (but familiar) shore. Luke gets disqualified from taking the pilgrim oath and gives some horrific wartime advice. Dan makes it out of this episode looking
- [Touch of Iron: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/touch-of-iron-part-one/) - Summer is here and we're starting out... hot? And by that I mean Luke is rescinding another hot take. Turns out you actually shouldn't skip leg day. Here's a quick question for you guys; what's your wasp fighting technique? Cause Dan's got a new one you should try. I promise it's related to the book.
- [The Three Body Problem: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-three-body-problem-part-three/) - Dan and Luke, defenders of the meek, come to the aid of natural gas. Sort of? (5:45 to skip to the book stuff) Professor Dan's back at it again, this week we are learning about cold welding. And by learning I mean you should really look it up yourself because Dan is probably wrong. Shi
- [The Three Body Problem: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-three-body-problem-part-two/) - Well, last episode we didn't think of the most obvious use of the V-suit... Dan tells us the real reason the V-suit is popular and why Wang's wife should be a little worried. And to the Trisolarans, DM us, we've got some advice on how to make your world a little more comfortable. Also can
- [The Three Body Problem: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-three-body-problem-part-one/) - Friendship: one of the pillars of podcasting. Listen to hear about Dan and Luke's new friends (0:00 to 4:15). Organization: another pillar, Luke and Dan give some advice on how organizational skills can help our boys in Three Body Problem. Also how big of a waste of technology is this video game? Hear our suggestions
- [The Fifth Season: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-fifth-season-part-three/) - School's....in? Luke comes to office hours and gets himself learned. Also get hyped for our next big media project, Life Hacked (6:30). Luke and Dan debate if Essun is mother of the year, or monster of the year. Luke decides to rain on Dan's pirate parade and freaks out about just like, some casual murder.
- [The Fifth Season: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-fifth-season-part-two/) - If you've been apartment shopping in your life then boy do we have a #relatable rant for you (6:19). Long time listeners will not be surprised or disappointed when we talk about the pets of this world for way too long. Also Luke takes a brave stand to point out when we as readers are
- [The Fifth Season: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-fifth-season-part-one/) - You might be wondering, "Luke and Dan, how are you gonna make a discussion about this horrifyingly dark book funny?" We were wondering the same thing. So we start with a little catharsis, move to a few predictions, and by the end I think we stumble into a few slivers of comedic light among the
- [Warbreaker: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/warbreaker-part-three/) - Dan kicks this episode off by bringing up Game of Thrones yet again, in spite of his earlier pledge to stop talking about it (5:04). As we wrap up the book Dan decides to ruin the idea of Kalad's Phantoms for all of us, but also acknowledges how horrible his theory from Part Two was.
- [Warbreaker: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/warbreaker-part-two/) - Luke is lookin fresh and no man is gonna stop him (07:30). Your favorite fantasy fellows propose several crucial innovations for T'Telir. Dan, known to some as fantasy Sherlock, pieces together a brilliant prediction about the Returned. Also, if you thought we were done talking about what the Returned would eat you must be on
- [Aching God: Mike Shel Interview](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/aching-god-mike-shel-interview/) - Mike Shel pretty much schools us on Aching God, RPGs, psychology, and proper methods of maniacal, sadistic punishment. We laughed. We cried. Dan was almost flayed alive. A good time had by all. Check out Mike on Twitter @MikeShelAuthor and see Aching God as a finalist in the SPFBO competition. Special thanks to VOLO for
- [Aching God: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/aching-god-part-three/) - To start this episode we revolutionize the book adaptation world by throwing out video game ideas (10:50). Tweet us your video game adaptations of books with #adaptmyvideogamealready and we'll rant and/or rave about how terrible/good your idea is. Throughout the rest of the episode Dan makes several terrible theories about Aching God, and somehow still
- [Aching God: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/aching-god-part-two/) - Get excited, we are talking about swords this episode. Do you agree with Dan and his perfectly reasonable stance about swords being tools with a somber purpose and thus not deserving of names, or are you a bigger sociopath than Auric? Yep, we're calling out Auric again. Also, Luke spots a shield sized problem with
- [Aching God: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/aching-god-part-one/) - Dan gets this episode started by giving away a great fantasy plot idea for free, then we start discussing the first 13 chapters of Aching God by Mike Shel (5:30). Luke laments the lost look of the imposing desk and we both come down a little harshly on Auric.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro
- [The Lies of Locke Lamora: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-lies-of-locke-lamora-part-three/) - Luke and Dan debate the merits of skipping leg day (spoilers: don't.) But feel free to skip to 6:25 to hear fan favorites like, "Why are we giving sick people wine not water?" and "Bondsmages are cheating, right?". What ridiculous animal combinations would you create for the Duke's feast? Tweet your suggestions to @DCitaBC with
- [The Lies of Locke Lamora: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-lies-of-locke-lamora-part-two/) - No intro segment for this episode, we start already warmed up to cover the first 10 chapters of the Lies of Locke Lamora by Scott Lynch. Dan spends a while raving about how good this book is and Luke calls out the Grey King for cheating. If you're worried that the first half is too
- [The Lies of Locke Lamora: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-lies-of-locke-lamora-part-one/) - Tune in to this episode to hear Dan's very controversial opinions on lobotomy, but first listen to Luke give some advice on healthy living. Oh and in case you're not sure what the final conflict will be we've got you covered with some pretty solid predictions.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Fire Upon the Deep: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-fire-upon-the-deep-part-three/) - Remember The Colony show from 2009? Well Dan does...Ya boys develop a theory live in episode. We also get into some dubious astrophysics, but who's going to call us out for it? Seriously someone should probably get @ us (@DCitaBC). Special thanks to VOLO for the intro/outro music.
- [A Fire Upon the Deep: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-fire-upon-the-deep-part-two/) - No warm-up this time, just those clean, 100% pure, pristine book nuggets. Speaking of dank nugs, this week we once again return to talking about space dogs smoking that sticky icky. Dan posts up a couple of deep three pointer theories and for no reason whatsoever Luke brings Cuba into this mess.Special thanks to VOLO
- [A Fire Upon the Deep: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-fire-upon-the-deep-part-one/) - Luke and Dan rile each other up over audiobooks, then start the first episode on the Fire Upon the Deep by Vernor Vinge. Both of us spend a good amount of time discussing the intricacies of the dog pack society of the Tines (dog packs using bows and arrows, whaaat?), then get really excited about
- [A Clash of Kings: Part Four](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-clash-of-kings-part-four/) - Your two favorite podcast hosts finally make their pitch to transition to Hollywood with the new Eragon Trailer. Dan is crowned the king of theories, and Luke give Lollys some (completely justified) sympathy. Also Daenerys did it again. Again. Trust me we don't want to keep talking about this, but Daenerys did it again.Special thanks
- [A Clash of Kings: Part Three](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-clash-of-kings-part-three/) - As promised we start this episode by nailing down the trailer for our new Eragon movie before talking about A Clash of Kings by George R. R. Martin. Dan shows off his negotiating skills and Luke roasts Jon Snow's package opening skills.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Clash of Kings: Part Two](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-clash-of-kings-part-two/) - In this episode we spend the first 10 minutes brainstorming about the plotline for our Eragon movie, then discuss A Clash of Kings by George R. R. Martin. Luke laments the winter preparations being made in Westeros and Dan makes a theory about Craster's wives.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [A Clash of Kings: Part One](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/a-clash-of-kings-part-one/) - Before talking about A Clash of Kings by George R. R. Martin we talk about the new Eragon book and pitch our idea for a new movie. Luke points out the overwhelming evidence for #FlatWesteros and Dan tries to convince Luke of his most recent theory.We will be taking a week off for the holidays,
- [Mail Bag!](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/mail-bag/) - Luke and Dan take a one-episode hiatus from books, and take a stab at discussing other media. Luke gives his thoughts on the new Fantastic Beasts movie, and Dan talks about fantasy TV shows. Worried our style won't work on anything but books? That's probably fair.Have something you want us to talk about? Tweet us
- [The Crimson Queen Part Three + Author Interview](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-crimson-queen-part-three-author-interview/) - The boys are back at it again. In a very anti-Immortal episode Luke roasts Demian, and Dan comes down very hard on Jan (again). We wrap up our discussion of The Crimson Queen by revealing the consequences of climate engineering. Wondering why this episode is twice as long? Alec Hutson, author of The Crimson Queen,
- [The Crimson Queen Part Two: Chapters 13 - 26](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-crimson-queen-part-two-chapters-13-26/) - Dan gets a little Marxist early on and comes down a little harsh on Jan. Luke's ridiculous "bird fireworks" comment from last episode is somehow vindicated. We also ponder the important questions. Thanks to VOLO for the intro/outro music.
- [The Crimson Queen Part One: Chapters 1 - 12](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-crimson-queen-part-one-chapters-1-12/) - It's a Thanksgiving miracle! Luke and Dan are back at it again: Luke planning a culture change seminar for Keilan's village, Dan convincing Luke sorcery is fantastic for one very specific reason. Also Luke makes a bold prediction involving Godzilla.
- [The Name of the Wind Part Four: Chapters 72 - End](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-name-of-the-wind-part-four-chapters-72-end/) - Dan ruins Christmas then brings up new evidence for his Ben-Denna theory. Luke points out that Kvothe probably wears a fedora, and we talk about our ratings for the Name of the Wind before announcing our next book.Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [The Name of the Wind Part Three: Chapters 47-71](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-name-of-the-wind-part-three-chapters-47-71/) - Luke and Dan talk about voting just in time to miss the election, then jump into the third section of The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfuss. We roast Kvothe and Denna for about half the episode, then Dan comes up with arguably his best theory to date. Special thanks to VOLO for intro
- [The Name of the Wind Part Two: Chapters 18-46](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-name-of-the-wind-part-two-chapters-18-46/) - Luke and Dan throw a little shade on a Halloween tradition and attempt to answer the age old question: what is money? You won't believe which character is actually a certified sneaker head! Listen to find out! (Tryna go viral guys) Special thanks to VOLO for intro and outro music.
- [The Name of the Wind Part One: Chapters 1-17](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-name-of-the-wind-part-one-chapters-1-17/) - In our first Kingkiller Chronicles episode we have a long conversation about Dungeons and Dragons before getting into the book. Dan calls Abenthy the Arcanist a dick and Luke gets scared by a Chandrian with bad hair. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Hyperion Part 3: Chapter 5 - End](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/hyperion-part-3-chapter-5-end/) - We wrap up the last episode covering Hyperion by Dan Simmons with discussions about the last two chapters and the book as a whole. Dan convinces Luke yet again to buy into one of his theories, and Luke endorses the Consul's crazy decision. Thanks to VOLO for our intro and outro music.
- [Hyperion Part 2: Chapters 3 and 4](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/hyperion-part-2-chapters-3-and-4/) - In our second Hyperion episode Luke unveils a new idea for a fan appreciation event (Hint: it involves LeBron), and Dan leads a surprisingly serious discussion about Dan Simmons. We also develop several theories covering topics ranging from cyborgs to hipsters. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Hyperion Part 1: Chapters 1 and 2](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/hyperion-part-1-chapters-1-and-2/) - Luke gives some details about his vacation and we jump into our first episode covering Hyperion. Dan shows off his impressive knowledge of math and physics while discussing artificial gravity, then we decide that Colonel Kassad probably just wants to be playing Call of Duty and telling yo mama jokes. Special thanks to VOLO for
- [The Emperor's Soul](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/the-emperors-soul/) - Dan complains about the lack of alien representation in Star Wars, then we discuss Brandon Sanderson's novella The Emperor's Soul. We have a spirited debate over the ethics of master painters and break ground on the invention of toilets. Special thanks to VOLO for the intro and outro music.
- [Game of Thrones Part Four: Chapters 61 - End](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/game-of-thrones-part-four-chapters-61-end/) - Luke flip flops on his previous hot take about the T.V. show being better than this incredible book and introduces a new hot take about Catelyn chapters. Dan makes a brilliant Risk analogy and masterfully ties a bow on the #FlatWesteros and #WarriorTyrion theories. Also while Luke is stuffin his face with pizza pies in
- [Game of Thrones Part Three: Chapters 41 - 60](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/game-of-thrones-part-three-chapters-41-60/) - LeBron, excited to start this new collab. Get at us. We reveal the embarrassing truth Tywin Lannister doesn't want you to know, and try not to dunk too hard on Ned Stark. Thanks to VOLO for our intro and outro music.
- [Game of Thrones Part Two: Chapters 21 - 40](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/game-of-thrones-part-two-chapters-21-40/) - We discuss chapters 21 - 40 of A Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin. Dan unveils a conspiracy theory about Tyrion, we further develop our flat Westeros theory, and we both complain about intramural sports. Thanks to VOLO for our intro and outro music.
- [Game of Thrones Part One: Chapters 1 - 20](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/game-of-thrones-part-one-chapters-1-20/) - We discuss the first 20 chapters of A Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin. We unveil our flat Westeros theory, and Luke makes a hot take about Lord of the Rings. Think you can prove him wrong? Tweet us at @DCitaBC with your argument. Thanks again to VOLO for our intro and outro
- [Elantris Part Two: Chapter 57 - End](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/elantris-part-two-chapter-57-end/) - Elantris part 2 - we discuss the last section of Elantris from chapter 57 onward. Dan brings up a new theory, and Luke complains about hardcover books. Thanks to VOLO for the use of Mystic as our intro and outro music.
- [Elantris Part One: Chapters 1 - 56](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/elantris-part-one-chapters-1-56/) - Welcome to Don't Call it a Book Club! In our first episode Luke makes a hot take about Game of Thrones and we break down the first 56 chapters of Elantris by Brandon Sanderson. Topics include Elantrian fight clubs, the magic system of Elantris, and several rants by Dan.Thanks to VOLO for the use of
- [Intro episode](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcast/intro-episode/) - The intro episode to Don't Call it a Book Club, giving you a taste of our style. Not sophisticated enough for you? Oooh someone's an intellectual that reads fantasy novels for complex and nuanced discussion.

## Tags

- [Brandon Sanderson](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/brandon-sanderson/)
- [Elantris](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/elantris/)
- [George R. R. Martin](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/george-r-r-martin/)
- [ASoIaF](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/asoiaf/)
- [Dan Simmons](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/dan-simmons/)
- [Hyperion Cantos](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/hyperion-cantos/)
- [Patrick Rothfuss](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/patrick-rothfuss/)
- [The Kingkiller Chronicle](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-kingkiller-chronicle/)
- [Alec Hutson](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/alec-hutson/)
- [The Raveling](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-raveling/)
- [Author Interview](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/author-interview/)
- [Mailbag](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/mailbag/)
- [Vernor Vinge](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/vernor-vinge/)
- [Scott Lynch](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/scott-lynch/)
- [Gentleman Bastards](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/gentleman-bastards/)
- [Mike Shel](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/mike-shel/)
- [Iconoclasts](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/iconoclasts/)
- [Cosmere](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/cosmere/)
- [Broken Earth](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/broken-earth/)
- [N. K. Jemisin](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/n-k-jemisin/)
- [Liu Cixin](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/liu-cixin/)
- [Remembrance of Earth's Past](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/remembrance-of-earths-past/)
- [Timandra Whitecastle](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/timandra-whitecastle/)
- [The Living Blade](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-living-blade/)
- [The First Law](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-first-law/)
- [Joe Abercrombie](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/joe-abercrombie/)
- [The Witcher](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-witcher/)
- [Andrzej Sapkowski](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/andrzej-sapkowski/)
- [Fonda Lee](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/fonda-lee/)
- [The Green Bone Saga](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-green-bone-saga/)
- [The Lot Lands](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-lot-lands/)
- [Jonathan French](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/jonathan-french/)
- [Pierce Brown](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/pierce-brown/)
- [Red Rising Saga](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/red-rising-saga/)
- [Will Wight](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/will-wight/)
- [Cradle](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/cradle/)
- [Peter Newman](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/peter-newman/)
- [The Vagrant](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-vagrant/)
- [Madeline Miller](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/madeline-miller/)
- [Andrew Rowe](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/andrew-rowe/)
- [Arcane Ascension](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/arcane-ascension/)
- [Brent Weeks](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/brent-weeks/)
- [Lightbringer](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/lightbringer/)
- [JY Neon Yang](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/jy-neon-yang/)
- [Colored Pages Book Club](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/colored-pages-book-club/)
- [M. L. Wang](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/m-l-wang-2/)
- [Watch Duty](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/watch-duty/)
- [Christopher Paolini](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/christopher-paolini/)
- [Fractalverse](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/fractalverse/)
- [Jim Butcher](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/jim-butcher/)
- [Codex Alera](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/codex-alera/)
- [Evan Winter](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/evan-winter/)
- [The Burning](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-burning/)
- [The Stormlight Archive](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-stormlight-archive/)
- [The Fantasy Inn](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-fantasy-inn/)
- [Zen Cho](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/zen-cho/)
- [Seth Dickinson](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/seth-dickinson/)
- [The Masquerade](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-masquerade/)
- [Neal Stephenson](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/neal-stephenson/)
- [Eidyn](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/eidyn/)
- [Justin Lee Anderson](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/justin-lee-anderson/)
- [Steven Erikson](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/steven-erikson/)
- [Malazan Book of the Fallen](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/malazan-book-of-the-fallen/)
- [Ten Very Big Books](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/ten-very-big-books/)
- [Heartstrikers](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/heartstrikers/)
- [Rachel Aaron](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/rachel-aaron/)
- [Foundation](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/foundation/)
- [Isaac Asimov](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/isaac-asimov/)
- [T. Kingfisher](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/t-kingfisher/)
- [Trick or Treat](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/trick-or-treat/)
- [Octavia Butler](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/octavia-butler/)
- [Parable](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/parable/)
- [J. Zachary Pike](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/j-zachary-pike/)
- [The Dark Profit Saga](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-dark-profit-saga/)
- [Scott Hawkins](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/scott-hawkins/)
- [Terry Brooks](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/terry-brooks/)
- [Original Shannara Trilogy](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/original-shannara-trilogy/)
- [Brian Jacques](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/brian-jacques/)
- [Redwall](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/redwall/)
- [Tad Williams](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/tad-williams/)
- [Memory Sorrow and Thorn](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/memory-sorrow-and-thorn/)
- [Tamsyn Muir](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/tamsyn-muir/)
- [The Locked Tomb](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-locked-tomb/)
- [Murderbot Diaries](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/murderbot-diaries/)
- [Martha Wells](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/martha-wells/)
- [Ann Leckie](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/ann-leckie/)
- [Imperial Radch](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/imperial-radch/)
- [Daniel O'Malley](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/daniel-omalley/)
- [Hiron Ennes](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/hiron-ennes/)
- [Graceling Realm](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/graceling-realm/)
- [Kristin Cashore](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/kristin-cashore/)
- [John Bierce](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/john-bierce/)
- [Mage Errant](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/mage-errant/)
- [Immortal Great Souls](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/immortal-great-souls/)
- [Phil Tucker](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/phil-tucker/)
- [Mistborn](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/mistborn/)
- [Moniquill Blackgoose](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/moniquill-blackgoose/)
- [Nampeshiweisit](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/nampeshiweisit/)
- [H. P. Lovecraft](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/h-p-lovecraft/)
- [Ruthanna Emrys](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/ruthanna-emrys/)
- [Victor LaValle](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/victor-lavalle/)
- [David Gemmell](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/david-gemmell/)
- [The Drenai saga](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-drenai-saga/)
- [Tide Child](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/tide-child/)
- [R. J. Barker](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/r-j-barker/)
- [Shades of Magic](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/shades-of-magic/)
- [V. E. Schwab](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/v-e-schwab/)
- [The Expanse](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-expanse/)
- [James S. A. Corey](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/james-s-a-corey/)
- [Rosemary Kirstein](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/rosemary-kirstein/)
- [The Steerswoman](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-steerswoman/)
- [Stephen King](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/stephen-king/)
- [The Dark Tower](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-dark-tower/)
- [nobody103](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/nobody103/)
- [Rebecca Yarros](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/rebecca-yarros/)
- [Empyrean](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/empyrean/)
- [Matt Dinniman](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/matt-dinniman/)
- [Dungeon Crawler Carl](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/dungeon-crawler-carl/)
- [Leigh Bardugo](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/leigh-bardugo/)
- [Christopher Buehlman](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/christopher-buehlman/)
- [R.F. Kuang](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/r-f-kuang/)
- [Babel](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/babel/)
- [R. F. Kuang](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/r-f-kuang-2/)
- [Nicholas Eames](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/nicholas-eames/)
- [The Band](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-band/)
- [Teixcalaan](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/teixcalaan/)
- [Arkady Martine](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/arkady-martine/)
- [James Islington](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/james-islington/)
- [A. M. Shine](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/a-m-shine/)
- [Movie](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/movie/)
- [Shadow of the Leviathan](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/shadow-of-the-leviathan/)
- [Becky Chambers](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/becky-chambers/)
- [Terry Pratchett](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/terry-pratchett/)
- [The Discworld](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/the-discworld/)
- [Antonia Hodgson](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/antonia-hodgson/)
- [Tom Sweterlitsch](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/tom-sweterlitsch/)
- [Katherine Addison](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/katherine-addison/)
- [Michael Crichton](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/michael-crichton/)
- [Z. B. Steele](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/tag/z-b-steele/)

## Podcasts

- [Don't call it a book club.](https://dontcallitabookclub.com/podcasts/dont-call-it-a-book-club/)